Showing posts with label Weekend Warzone. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Weekend Warzone. Show all posts

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

WEEKEND WARZONE: MUSIKALITY!


Mortal Kombat exploded onto the gaming scene in 1992 with a spray of blood and bones, and ever since, fans have watched closely as Scorpion and Sub-Zero have battled their way through thick and thin; sometimes against each other, but usually for the greater good of Earthrealm!

The first MK presented us with the mysterious Japanese ninja, Scorpion, whose bitter hatred for his Lin Kuei counterpart brought him back from the pits of hell on a mission of revenge. As we would learn much later, Scorpion believed Sub-Zero and his clan to be reponsible for the death of himself, his family, and the entire army of Shirai-Ryu ninja. In truth, Sub-Zero was only responsible for the death of the ninja, having killed him while the pair were pitted against one and other in a competition to obtain rare artifacts belonging to the fallen Elder God, Shinnok.

Responsible for their adversarial contest, and the eradication of the Shirai-Ryu, was the elusive Netherealm sorcerer, Quan Chi. In exchange for Sub-Zero's successful retrieval of Shinnok's powerful amulet, Quan Chi used his mystic arts in an ambush to destroy the clan.

Unware of these details - Scorpion pursued Sub-Zero even after successfully avenging his death at the Mortal Kombat tournament of the first game. In the sequel, believing his foe to have survived, Scorpion returned once more, but soon discovered this Sub-Zero was an honorable inheritor of the mantle that had once been his brothers! Scorpion vowed to defend this Sub-Zero if ever he could, but their alliance would be uneventful, if short lived.

Still bound to the vengeful curse of the spectre, Scorpion returned during Shinnok's war on the gods to seek out Sub-Zero once more, now believing him to be tied to his infernal damnation. Scorpion defeated the younger Sub-Zero, but soon learned the truth of Quan Chi's treachery, which had involved his manipulation against the interference of the younger Sub-Zero.

As defeat was dealt to Shinnok -- Scorpion dragged Quan Chi down with him to the Netherealm, where the ninja spectre intended to pursue the last stage of his quest for vengeance.

The powerful sorcerer was able to evade death at the hands of the ninja, but did not escape the Netherealm until discovering ancient runes that revealed the prophecy of the Dragon King. Using two oni - Moloch and Drahmin - Quan Chi successfully drove of Scorpion's attacks and escaped the Netherealm to form an alliance with another powerful sorcerer - Shang Tsung.
Scorpion too escaped in an unsuccessful bid to exact revenge on Quan Chi (and end the deadly alliance), but was thwarted by the oni who pursued him, destroying his physical form in a tornado of souls that ripped the impurities of his body apart.

Reformed - Scorpion was recruited by the Elder Gods as their new champion, destined to defeat the ultimately resurrected Dragon King - Onaga! Scorpion served them well, but when Onaga was finally defeated, his vengeful attentions were torn from Quan Chi, redirected toward the Elder Gods who promised him the resurrection of the Shirai-Ryu, but delivered an army of undead.

The scenes in our special presentation, taken from Mortal Kombat 4, reveal the dramatic moment Quan Chi revealed his treachery to Sub-Zero and Scorpion. With music by Matt Berry (the theme from Snuff Box), a little imagination will have you singing along as each character sings his part in a musical tale of betrayal, treachery, and retribution.

In this scene, Sub-Zero compells Scorpion to recognise his innocence ["To live on my own just seems tragic"] when the ninja confronts him ["I can't be in love if it's plastic"]. Scorpion warns of his vengeance should Sub-Zero be deceiving him ["But we'll raise our swords high when our day comes"], only to learn the truth in shocking fashion ["You thought it was gold, but it was bronze"]. Scorpion then ultimately joins Sub-Zero, using his powers to destroy the sorcerer.

Critics are already calling Mortal Kombat Mythologies: Scorpion the Musical as tragic anything the Greeks ever conceived. Tragic, indeeeeeed!

Sunday, April 13, 2008

WEEKEND WARZONE: THIS GODDAMN BATMAN!

I know what you're thinking: Why did noone think to merge the indie sounds of The Smiths with Frank Miller's All-Star Batman sooner?

The Infinite Wars are here but to serve with another unlikely dose of the Weekend Warzone!
In the interest of full disclosure, please note that the music used is not entirely riff faithful, nor are the monotoned dronings sufficient to deliver any more than vaguely resonant lyrics. Not bad for half an hour wasted in the office, but by no means award winning production. Don't pretend like the buttshots don't make up for it. [Images with a white border were lifted from imockery.com.]

Lyrics:
Dark Knight detective, on a hillside desolate
Will training make a bat of me yet?...
When in this charming car, this goddamn Batman
He contemplates Gotham's complexities,
where the leather runs smooth in the Batmobile
I would fight crime tonight, but I haven't got a stitch to wear
This Batman, just slapped me, and told me, that I shouldn't care
(Ah!) A trumped up circus boy, who never knew his place,
he says, they were killed by a crime ring
He knows so much about these things...
He knows so much about these things...

Sunday, January 13, 2008

WEEKEND WARZONE: GOMDULLA STRIKES!

Get the full written report: Spider-man Family #3!
[Contrary to the title, I wouldn't expect to see these weekly!]