WRECKING CREW versus DEADPOOL, SPIDER-MAN & PUNISHER

(Marvel)
Where: Deadpool: Suicide Kings #5 When: October 2009 Why: Mike Benson & Adam Glass How: Carlo Barberi

The Story So Far...
A standard job for the Merc' with a Mouth becomes a battle for life & death as a hit on Tombstone turns in to a double-or-nothing bet that Deadpool won't survive the next twenty-four hours!

It's the high-stakes gamble of client Conrad O'Shea: who's counting on his mercenary to escape a frame-up for blowing up his apartment building, and the heroes who responded to take him down.

Fortunately for Deadpool; Daredevil helps convince The Punisher and Spider-Man of his innocence -- providing the patsy some much-needed assistance when Tombstone sics his newest bodyguards on him -- The Wrecking Crew!

Tale of the Tape...
Strength: The Wrecker 6 (Invincible)
Intelligence: Thunderball 5 (Professor)
Speed: Spider-Man 4 (Olympian)
Stamina: The Wrecker 6 (Generator)
Agility: Spider-Man 5 (Cat-Like)
Fighting: Punisher 4 (Trained)
Energy: Punisher 4 (Arsenal)
Total: Spider-Man 29 (Metahuman)

My X (nee Twitter) feed recently threw an interesting critique my way that piqued my interest -- so it's about time we expanded the file on The Wrecking Crew!

The Wrecking Crew are: The Wrecker, Piledriver, Thunderball, and Bulldozer.

They aren't just a pack of my favourite goons and yours -- they're a super heavyweight team possessing powerful weapons that were enchanted with Asgardian magic!

This enchantment was first bestowed upon petty burglar Dirk Garthwaite, when Karnilla the Norn Queen mistook him for Loki, during a home invasion and robbery of the Norse god's New York abode. The crook soon decided to share the wealth, recruiting three of his pals into a deadly team of powerhouse thugs!

At first, sharing his power drastically reduced The Wrecker's super-human strength and stamina, but over the years, all of The Crew have found ways to become powered-up opponents for the mighty Thor, as well as other major heroes of the Marvel Universe.

This was the source of Jered McCorkle's assertion that recently losing to Daredevil & Elektra was a career low for The Wrecker -- and despite being a personal favourite, we've only briefly touched upon the misdeeds of The Wrecker and his Crew. Something we aim to correct today!

The Wrecking Crew were the first opponents for The Thunderbolts when the villains-in-disguise went public. Citizen V showed that agility and fighting prowess were sufficient to tangle with The Wrecker, but it took the strength of Atlas to truly deal any damage. A concentrated gas delivered straight to the gullet by Mach-V and Songbird was ultimately responsible for putting most of the team down.

It was a different story when The Wrecking Crew were challenged by a lone Sasquatch, however. The gamma-irradiated hero put up a pretty good fight without his Alpha Flight teammates, but was ultimately out-numbered, out-muscled, and brutally beaten.

So, what do these two cases tell us? That The Wrecking Crew are double-tough, but not untouchable. Citizen V made the best case for surviving a wild mismatch with guile and agility -- something Deadpool and Spider-Man both possess.

We know Spidey can fight above his weight class, having lived to tell the gale after going toe-to-toe with the Hulk. We've even seen him outwit the Juggernaut not once, but twice -- with a little help from Wonder Woman!

Wouldn't you know, but Deadpool has achieved fairly similar feats as well! He defeated Hulk under slightly special circumstances for the jolly green goliath, and likewise survived Juggernaut long enough to get an assist from Siryn for the win!

Mach-V shows us that The Wrecking Crew aren't necessarily impervious to the threat of high-powered inhalants, which is the kind of all-purpose tactical weapon you might find in The Punisher's arsenal. He isn't there at the start of the fight, but will show up soon enough - and you know he isn't afraid to fight dirty!

Punisher isn't afraid to use the weapons of the enemy in his one-man war on crime. He may or may not be able to find a magically charmed option to best The Wrecker, but we know he levelled Rhino with the Satan Claw, and took down a cadre of super-villains, including Mister Hyde, with a stolen Ant-Man helmet and alien guns!

We clearly need more data, and since reviewing & analyzing fights is kinda what we do around here, let's dive in and find out how the street-level heroes fare!

The Tape: The Wrecking Crew Ranking: Spider-Man (#2)

What Went Down...

Deadpool & Spider-Man find themselves facing an unexpected, Asgardian-powered roadblock in their chase of Tombstone -- also known as The Wrecking Crew!

The Wrecker figures any one of them could handle "these stinkin' pipsqueaks" alone, but that won't stop the Merc' with a Mouth and his web-swinging cohort making the quartet earn it. The Crew are happy to oblige.

Bulldozer gets the fight started by charging at a leaping Spider-Man, while Thunderball swings his deadly ball & chain into an impact right at Deadpool's feet! Only the sole of one red boot is visible, but it's safe to say Carlo Barberi knows what he's doing when it comes to drawing anatomy past the ankle.

Spidey's an old hand at vaulting over charging powerhouses, but his leap takes him right into the path of The Wrecker -- whose enchanted crowbar smacks him high into the air and out of the park! [It's actually a construction site.]

Deadpool admires the shot with katana drawn, grateful that it wasn't him who was launched into the sky. Alas, he has no spider-sense to warn him of Bulldozer coming back around to run right through him with a rear assault!

The helmeted headbutt to the spine adjusts the mercenary across the battlefield, but he manages to make a neat landing -- and narrowly avoids being clobbered by Thunderball's ball, awkwardly dragging himself clear of the impact!

The dodge becomes a full frontal assault as Deadpool twists his body to bring the end of his blade arcing towards Piledriver -- but the overhead strike is caught between his enchanted hands. The Wrecker does the honors from there.

An enchanted crowbar smashes Deadpool in the face -- and for a moment he's knocked so silly he drifts into another plane of existence. A simpler reality, where dinner's getting cold and it's a Wednesday -- time for reading new issues.

As Deadpool groans in a crumpled mess -- Spidey comes plummeting back down to Earth with an unceremonious "wwhhhaamp".

Wrecker hoists Deadpool's mangled body by the collar and dangles him for Bulldozer to run armored head to chest right through him again. "The Wrecking Crew's tangled with Norse gods. You sissies never had a rat's ass chance."

Things look grim as Bulldozer encourages Piledriver to finish him, but a couple of well-placed web balls send the bruiser's left hook off course into The Wrecker's face!

Back on his feet and ready to rumble - Spidey blasts The Wrecker's eyes with web and his ears with an innuendo that would make Aunt May blush.

The quipping heroes go back to back and prepare for the riled-up Wrecking Crew to bring the fight to them. They compare notes on the Lethal Weapon franchise and The Warriors references as they brace for battle when suddenly -- a third player enters the fray with a powerful energy beam and focused sonic blast!

Bulldozer and Piledriver tumble destructively through the construction site as The Punisher arrives on a Goblin Glider with the Unicorn Power Horn still smoldering at his forehead, and one of Klaw's sonic disruptor blasters on his right hand!

He swoops over the two heroes with pumpkin bombs at the ready, tossing a trio of the explosives at The Wrecker and Thunderball. They're quickly engulfed in thick green gas, but remain unimpressed by the "minor league wannabes".

Spider-Man clues them in that Hobgoblin's "jack-o'-lanterns pack enough knockout gas to put down a herd of elephants."

The Wrecker hangs his head and drops to his knees as Thunderball falls face first to the ground. Deadpool sees that Wrecker joins his teammate, turning the enchanted crowbar against him with a smack to the face!

The Hammer...

In this house we love The Wrecking Crew, so when a doubt about a recent battle between The Wrecker and Daredevil & Elektra [in Daredevil (Vol.8) #24] came across my feed -- I was already primed to want to explore the subject more.

Daredevil himself was actually a part of this little 'Deadpool Team-Up' in earlier issues of Deadpool: Suicide Kings, but he manages to skip out on this chapter, remaining elsewhere until the fighting's over. By that time, the battle has moved on to another of my personal favourite bad guys: the man who hired The Wrecking Crew and essentially started this whole mess -- Tombstone!

So, while we couldn't quite source an exact comparison to The Wrecker's most recent indignity; Deadpool, The Punisher, and Spider-Man provide an interesting case study for street-level heroes taking The Wrecking Crew down.

It's interesting to note that Suicide Kings ostensibly repeats the same strategy that took The Wrecker down in Thunderbolts #1 -- one of the few previous entries we've actually recorded for the villain and his teammates.

Off the top of my head, I can't think of any significant earlier examples of knockout gas taking The Wrecker and his crew down. I wonder if writers Mike Benson and/or Adam Glass were influenced by the earlier T-Bolts issue, or just reached a similar conclusion for dispatching them. Perhaps we'll discover a pattern of vulnerability as we explore their various misdeeds in future updates.

I have a few Wrecker battles that have been burning up my desk over the years, but in those examples we'll establish more of the heavyweight brawling he's best known for. Not a lot of tactical tranquilizer gas in those issues, as I recall.

Obviously to address the claim in the inspiring tweet - I'd have to look at that particular issue, but one of the functions of Secret Wars on Infinite Earths is to provide abundant reference for historical precedent, and tangential examples. These records can support or dispute a result - real or imagined. Something that the current trend of so-called "AI" isn't necessarily so good at...

When I asked Google if The Wrecker had succumbed to gas in any Marvel Comics, its "AI" result claimed he hadn't. We know that's not true. We now have two very clear examples of that. You might like to keep that in mind next time you're looking for answers to comic book questions, or genuine 100% man-made sources to support. There's a Patreon for that, and I'd really appreciate it.

Secret Wars on Infinite Earths has supplied an archive of well over 700 in-depth results & reviews -- ranking more than 1,000 of your favourite characters in the process! You can find them all, and flex your mind muscle, by diving in to the Secret Index for a complete appendix in order of publisher, series, and issue.

I'd also encourage you to live life to the fullest, expanding your horizons and feeding your curiosity, with a rich diet of links to your favourite topics. You can find them throughout most entries on the site. It's a great way to see if I've come back to something interesting, or ventured into new & exciting tangents.

In the spirit of this latest entry -- I'd like to dig in to the other side of the equation. There are a lot of Daredevil and Elektra battles still waiting to be reviewed, but I have a particular example in mind that revisits Daredevil's penchant for tackling much bigger & stronger foes, from an era I've been taking an interest in. It'll be another good comparison for the fight with The Wrecker.

Of course, I presume part of the inciting social media grievance isn't just who defeated The Wrecker - but how.

It's fair to say not all comics are created equal, and I tend to be prone to sharing skepticism about the quality of editorial consistency in more recent issues. It doesn't seem like every writer and editor knows their stuff, or respects the process of building on the past with consistency and restraint, to create enduring iconic characters, and a cohesively developed shared universe.

2009 is a year I look back upon very fondly, but it's also one of the last years that I enjoyed consistent interest and enthusiasm for comics published by Marvel and DC. In my estimation, it's around then that the wheels start getting shaky, the stories are a little hit & miss, and the quality just isn't always there. [Something I'm willing to challenge through actual hands-on reviews, mind you...]

So where does Suicide Kings fit into that? Well, it does feel awfully convenient to dispatch bad guys who regularly throw down with Thor with a little gas, but it's delivered in the spirit of fun, and I don't feel that my intelligence, or the characters themselves, are being insulted by this. Their threat level is well represented, and barring any uncited contradiction, I don't really see any reason their enchantments should protect them from hostile inhalants beyond a general enhanced resistance -- something The Wrecker kinda demonstrated.

We could quibble minor details, like whether or not Spidey should be reduced to a purple stain by The Wrecker's crowbar, but let's just chalk it up to Spidey-senses, fast reaction times, and agile rolling with the "punches". Relax. Sometimes the needs of the story are what actually determines the outcome, and the mountain of overwhelming odds provided by powerhouse villains like The Wrecking Crew exists purely to be overcome. That's just fine and dandy. Get a hold of yourself.

Incidentally, Google's AI did suggest a 2010 episode of the Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes animated series, where The Wrecking Crew endures a gaseous dome of gamma irradiation without any issues. It's a series I'm familiar with and enjoyed very much, but wouldn't look to for precedent, because as we all know, adaptations are secondary sources, and prone to playing things fast and loose. Fans concerned with the degradation of The Wrecking Crew need only look at the barely recognisable group seen in Disney+'s She-Hulk: Attorney at Law. Just don't be deranged about it. Alright? Focus. Don't be strange.

Looking more broadly: I was a fast fan of Deadpool in the nineties and got a real kick out of his first on-going series with Joe Kelly and Ed McGuinness. Their combination of tights and comedy was a real blast, and set the ship off to a cult favourite start. The character got a little obnoxious throughout the 2000s, but I found Suicide Kings a pretty decent levelling out.

Deadpool: Suicide Kings #5 appeals to me very specifically with the four main heroes, and focus on The Wrecking Crew and Tombstone. Made that much more appealing by Carlo Barberi's clean pencils, and slick inks & colour from Sandu Florea and Marte Gracia, whom I'm assured aren't pseudonyms.

As someone who's enjoys it when Punisher is more than a psycho with sidearms -- I love the absurd visual and fitting tone of him cruising in on a stolen Goblin Glider, wearing Unicorn's suit & headgear, with a Klaw hand and lobbing Hobgoblin pumpkin bombs. A superb way to level the playing field and have a whole lot of freakin' fun.

The five issue mini isn't going to be a definitive representation for any of these characters, or one of the must-read tomes from Marvel, but if you're familiar with the characters, or curious to dip your toe in with no strings attached, it's a raucous ride through the borderland between organized crime and super-villainy. Worth your time -- and worth us coming back to in the future.

So what more do you need? I think I've covered all the bases and made this the most boring thing you've read all day! My work here is done!

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Winners: The Punisher & Deadpool (w/ Spider-Man)
#55 (+33) The Punisher
#21 (+2) Deadpool
#2 (--) Spider-Man [+1 assist]
#439 (-47) The Wrecker
#440 (-47) Piledriver
#443 (-29) Thunderball
#444 (-29) Bulldozer

ULTRON versus THE VILLAINS

The War Begins (Marvel)
Where: Marvel Super Heroes Secret Wars #1 When: May 1984 Why: Jim Shooter How: Michael Zeck

The Story So Far...
In a distant corner of space comes the existence of a sophisticated station suddenly populated with the confused ranks of many of Earth's mightiest heroes!

Abducted by an unknown force -- these Avengers, X-Men, and more await the intentions of their unseen captor, with little understanding, or influence, over their impending fate.

Amidst the assembly Captain America spies a second construct floating in the starry void above. The probing mind of Professor X finds a repellent aura of evil as he detects an identical predicament shared by some of their deadliest adversaries. As a galaxy is wiped away, and a new planet begins to form before awestruck eyes -- the villains begin to stir!

Tale of the Tape...
Strength: Galactus 7 (Omnipotent)
Intelligence: Galactus 7 (Omniscient)
Speed: Lizard 4 (Olympian)
Stamina: Galactus 7 (Unstoppable)
Agility: Lizard 4 (Gymnast)
Fighting: The Wrecker 3 (Street Wise)
Energy: Galactus 7 (Cosmic Power)
Total: Galactus 34 (Super)

The Beyonder may have distributed everyone into two camps, but if you expected the first blows of the Secret Wars to come between good and evil -- you were wrong! Ultron has no interest in forming alliances with any organic lifeforms!

The other villains are: Doctor Doom, Doctor Octopus, Kang The Conqueror, Enchantress, Absorbing Man, The Wrecker, Piledriver, Thunderball, Bulldozer, Lizard, and Molecule Man, with Galactus.

Ultron has a fusion reactor core powering his movements, capable of dishing out some serious firepower as well, with a composite adamantium hardshell durable enough to withstand a collision with The Thing!

Ultron is clearly a serious threat, but if The Wrecker and his Crew were to apply themselves -- they could probably pin Ultron down long enough to do some real damage. Throw in the Absorbing Man, able to copy Ultron's adamantium body for himself, and you've got a magically powered five-man trash compactor!

In the event the muscle needs a little direction, there's plenty of genius to go around. Doctor Doom is the obvious alpha in the group, but Enchantress is no stranger to directing or manipulating powerhouses into doing her bidding.

Kang The Conqueror has the resources and nous to potentially take on the Ultron problem alone, but that's no guarantee. Molecule Man is perhaps the best suited for that -- his ability to control things on a molecular level makes him nigh omnipotent. The only problem is a reluctance to use his awesome powers after repenting for a history of villainy with committed psychotherapy.

Doctor Octopus and Lizard are apex predators in their own environment, but here they may be the most vulnerable to Ultron's attack. Still, you'd like to think they're wily enough to join the other ranks -- provided they don't all turn on each other. Let's see exactly how it went!

The Tape: The Villains Ranking: Doctor Doom (#88)

What Went Down...

An incredible cosmic dance draws the eyes of the villainous collective upward as pieces of disparate land converge to form a new planet overhead. It's enough to leave Doctor Doom awestruck, but not all company is as unwaveringly focused.

Doctor Octopus doesn't take kindly to being jostled by the burly Absorbing Man.

The pair trade verbal barbs until suddenly -- a blast of energy engulfs them both!

Ultron simmers with power -- and the nearest thing approximating disdain -- as his robotic circuits struggle to make sense of his apparent reconstruction, and presence on the mysterious ship. From confusion defers basic function:

"I am Ultron! I do not understand the events transpiring! I do not understand how I came to be resurrected... Nor how I came to be here! Nothing computes... Insignificant! I am Ultron! My purpose is to slay that which lives. You are all living things, ergo -- Ultron must destroy you!"

Ultron takes flight and fires beams that narrowly miss Piledriver, Molecule Man, Kang, and Doctor Octopus -- but this time Absorbing Man is ready. He receives the energy and instantly nullifies its effects by assuming its properties!

The gambit inspires Doctor Doom to action, if not tactic, as he recognizes the potential threat of Ultron's adamantium body and fusion reactor.

The monarch lays his gauntlets on Molecule Man, grabbing him by his shirt to compel him to use his powers to stop Ultron. Alas, timid Owen Reece is just as overwhelmed as the robot, and reverts to a vow of abstinence made with his therapist. In a remarkable show of Molecule Man's power -- Doom compromises!

Determined to stop Ultron, but accepting Molecule Man's reluctance to harm anyone -- Doom offers an alternative minor act of mischief to Reece, which could make use of the unfathomable cosmic might at Galactus' disposal instead.

As Ultron's blasts explode between The Wrecking Crew and Enchantress; Molecule Man takes control of the subatomic make-up of the robot -- and sends him hurtling into the massive legs of Galactus!

For the first time since their arrival, The Devourer of Worlds pays notice to the tiny mortals scurrying around his feet.

Ultron begins to levitate by means other than his own, but continues to brandish his adamantium body and energy blasts in contempt for all that lives.

He sees Galactus as just another organic sentience to extinguish, perhaps failing to comprehend the forces that now control him.

Galactus gazes silently at the murderous robot as it floats to meet his eyeline.

Ultron dares to threaten The Devourer with a slow death for his affront.

The extinguishing of Ultron's flame takes a mere blinding moment as Galactus drains the robot's fusion reactor of all traces of energy without a word or gesture. A lifetime's supply of power gone in an instant -- a mere snack between the thumb and forefinger of a being beyond true comprehension!

The Hammer...

Just like that the first shots of the Secret Wars are fired -- but they aren't across enemy lines of good and evil!

There are essentially two sides to this conflict, with a faction or two forming somewhere in between, but it's the bad guys who are the first to fracture. A nice little bit of character detail that establishes the stakes, the scale of power that's in play, and gets us a taste of the action while introducing some of the stacked side of villainy.

It would've been so easy to have Ultron simply fall in line with the other bad guys, or undergo some sort of reprogramming from the outset, but instead we get the unadulterated joy of a homicidal robot immediately intent on extinguishing all organic life -- no matter how grand and beyond its reach it actually is! Bliss!

Ultron-10 was destroyed by Machine Man, The Thing, and Jocasta a couple of years prior in the pages of Marvel Two-In-One #93, contributing to the confusion of a tenth reconstruction in Secret Wars.

I guess The Beyonder is an Avengers fan who saw fit to bring Ultron back along with all the other popular toys. Doctor Doom will reprogram the defeated robot in the next issue, rebooting him for more play, but if you only knew the original twelve-part maxi-series as a tie-in ostensibly meant to sell action figures, you would've been surprised that an Ultron toy was never actually produced.

It's perhaps then doubly surprising that Galactus is ultimately the one to take Ultron down in the first real fight of the series.

The Devourer of Worlds is no stranger to conflict, but he isn't exactly known for trading blows with the rank and file, and also doesn't appear in the Mattel action figure line. The mark of a toymaker's unfulfilled aspirations -- or fanboy-turned-EIC Jim Shooter demanding a standard of quality for tie-in comics that would meet comic book readers' expectations beyond promotional consideration?

A few lines have attempted Galactus toys in the decades since Secret Wars, with Heroclix notably having the benefit of a small scale to work with, but it's only in the last couple of years that Marvel Legends has delivered the 32" tall Galactus action figure of our dreams. Standard 6" heralds fit in the palm of his hand. Not bad for $400 as a 2021 HasLabs backer, but undoubtedly a tough sell in 1984.

So if Galactus isn't in Marvel Super Heroes Secret Wars to be a deluxe playset, or towering lump of plastic sold through the Seers catalogue -- why is he here?

His concerns are typically much loftier than the mere mortals assembled to be bashed together in the hands of children, but I suppose if you asked me to name my most desired villains of the time, Galactus would probably be in the list, somewhere along with various other Fantastic Four opponents.

Galactus lends star-power and a sense of cosmic grandeur to the whole event, demonstrating just how high a level The Beyonder must be working on.

I suppose there's also an underlying potential for a ticking clock. Eventually Galactus will have to feed, and the composite planet created to host everyone is pretty much the only bar & grill that seems to be open in this corner of the universe. Existential drama only Galactus can provide in backdrop to a superhero war.

As for this battle: Galactus is clearly the winner, but could this result have been achieved without the involvement of Doctor Doom and Molecule Man?

The short answer is no -- but after careful deliberation, I've determined their actions, though vital, still only constitute a minor gesture: an assist.

Once his initial hopes to use Molecule Man's powers to end the fight are dashed, Doctor Doom conceives a plan to essentially gain Galactus' attention and pass the problem on to him. By throwing Ultron at the cosmic giant, Molecule Man merely triggers Galactus' entry into the fight, and the result is rendered from there.

We should also note that Thunderball and Bulldozer don't appear in this sequence until the fight is over, and Ultron's lifeless husk crashes back to the ground. The Lizard isn't even seen post-introductions until a vague group shot a couple pages after this. Characters clearly present will receive an assist stat for drawing fire, but it's unclear if these three even stuck around for the fight. We might infer Lizard ran and hid. For that reason I've omitted them from the minor count.

This was the very first fight, but we already opened the door last year with Marvel Super Heroes Secret Wars #3. I'm hoping we'll be able to continue working through the series in a linear fashion, taking in some of the interesting match-ups that come about, and tracking the progress of characters like Molecule Man, and newcomers Titania & Volcana.

You can catch all of that, and more, by following links throughout this post, or by plunging into unending secret wars of the Secret Archive! That's where all you desire is indexed in order of publisher, series, and issue number.

Secret Wars on Infinite Earths has featured well over 700 battles and ranked more than 1,000 iconic characters! You can make sure there are many more to come by becoming a supporter on Patreon. As a thank you for your patronage you'll find additional updates and multiple tiers to sponsor more feature content.

Get free daily links to fights inspired by the topics of the day by subscribing to Twitter and Facebook, or by becoming a freebie follower on Patreon. Don't forget to smash that like, fave, and share -- and keep your eyes peeled for the week's top trending battles every Sunday on Twitter & Patreon!

Winner: Galactus (w/ Molecule Man & Doctor Doom)
#128 (+246) Galactus
#640 (new) Molecule Man [+1 assist]
#88 (--) Doctor Doom [+1 assist]
#374 (+20) The Wrecker [+1 assist]
#375 (+22) Piledriver [+1 assist]
#376 (+44) Kang The Conqueror [+1 assist]
#641 (new) Amora the Enchantress [+1 assist]
#670 (+315) Absorbing Man [+1 assist]
#988 (-2) Doctor Octopus [+1 assist]
#381 (-146) Ultron

SASQUATCH versus THE WRECKING CREW
Alpha To Omega (Marvel comics)
Where: Omega Flight #1 When: June 2007
Why: Michael Avon Oeming How: Scott Kolins

The story so far...
Suffering a defeat that saw the death of most of it's members, Alpha Flight came to an end with the attack of the being known as The Collective.

The only survivor, Sasquatch, retreats from the life led as a superhero to return to his first love of science, but as the Americans begin to crack down with the advent of their Hero Registration Act, problems begin to creep across the boarder to Canadian soil.

The Canadian government, with aid from the US, seeks to reform the team around Sasquatch as Omega Flight, the last chance to prove once and for all Canada is worthy of a super team. However, before the team can gather, Sasquatch finds himself thrust back into action as the Wrecking Crew roll into mapleleaf country, looking to raise rabble without opposition.

Previous Form:
The Wrecking Crew [#24]: Defeated by an early incarnation of Thunderbolts.
Sasquatch: Making his first appearance.

Tale of the tape...
Strength: Wrecker 6 (Invincible)
Intelligence: Sasquatch 6 (Genius)
Speed: Bulldozer 3 (Athlete)
Stamina: Piledriver 6 (Generator)
Agility: Draw 2 (Average)
Fighting Ability: Piledriver 3 (Street Wise)
Energy Powers: Thunderball 4 (Arsenal)


Alright, so I'm not a big Alpha Flight fan, but I can get behind what they're about. One of the greatest contradictions of mainstream superhero comics is the relative lack of diversity amongst their powers, with the improbable majority of radiation leaks and magic infusions occuring in the United States.
From that perspective, I think Alpha Flight is a good thing. Omega Flight, ironically, not so much, but it's inclusion of US mainstays into the mix is the least of it's problems. More on that later.

I like the Wrecking Crew. For the most part they're a pack of poorly designed super-thugs, but I like them, I think they're a good bit of fun, and I quite enjoyed the last time we took a look at them. [Thunderbolts #1]

In the painstakes they're a mob of heavy hitters that make even Thor blush, each possessing their own Nordic enchantments on an assortment of cheesy, suitably thematic weapons. Wrecking balls, crowbars, standard fare for a team of mooks pitting their hopes on the market value of a brand built on construction.

Some minor fluctuation aside, Sasquatch is a Hank Pym-level intellect with a Hulk-level body, give or take some fur. When it comes to combat he's no slouch, but in the way Hulk can rise to the challenge of a god like Thor, I'm not terribly confident in Sasquatch's mythic abilities.

Considering each member of the Crew derives their powers from Norse god-power, that doesn't bode well for ol' saskie. For Sasquatch to stand any chance against a team of this level it would require surroundings that could facilitate an intelligent strategy, that might see him pick each member off one by one in a stealthy Canadian Wolverine-fest. Or, failing that, Alpha Flight would have to come to his aid, which completely evens the stakes.

Alas, this battle is schedule for Sasquatch alone, so there's little to no argument for Sasquatch to debut with a victory in the Infinite Wars. Still, as the only survivor of The Collective's slaughter, he can probably at least look forward to a bout of unconsciousness, before returning to his survivor's guilt.

The Math: The Wrecking Crew (Total) Sasquatch (Average)
The Pick: The Wrecking Crew

What went down...
Rolling into Canada and raising hell seems to be the best plan the Wrecking Crew have ever pulled off until they step out of the bar they've spent the night terrorizing.

Bulldozer takes a shotgun blast from a nervous resident, but his cackling is cut short by something descending from amidst the rain. "Hey, what is that?

Their celebrations for the absence of familiar heroes are cut short when Sasquatch lands with destructive results. Like a cartoon nail, Bulldozer is buried in the ground by the force of Sasquatch's landing.

Piledriver makes remark of current affairs, having believed Sasquatch had died with his fellows in the slaughter of Alpha Flight. Sasquatch snarls something in response, and The Wrecker kicks off the action once more with a promise to clarify the situation, raising his enchanted crowbar in the air.

Sasquatch puts the Wrecker down hard, using his speed and reach to great effect with a swiping attack. He fields further speculation about whether or not he's a clone, keeping Wrecker and his enchanted crowbar underfoot until Piledriver initiates a rush attack.

Sasquatch takes the hit, and lets loose with emotion, defying the Wrecking Crew's intentions to roll into a defensless Canada.

He stalks confidently back into battle with the Wrecker, but suffers a chain garotte from behind from Thunderball.

Wrecker and Thunderboll lay into the Alpha Flight survivor with unrelenting blows. In desperation, Sasquatch lashes out with his claws, raking at Thunderball's eyes sufficiently to temporarily blind him.

Free from restraint, Sasquatch pounds the ground, scattering the members of the Crew, while he has flashbacks of the demise of his team at the hands of The Collective. The memories drive him into a feral rage, but before he can act on them, a truck hurtles through the air toward him.

The truck explodes, putting Sasquatch down for the count.
Ever the villainous types, the Wrecking Crew seek retribution in blood, all four members laying into the fallen Sasquatch with murderous intent.

The hammer...
The winners by knock out, the Wrecking Crew!
This marks their second outing as a unit, and their first victory, after suffering a defeat in another series starter. Which contrasts the way to start a superhero comic; either with a strong initiation at the expense of an established threat (ie; the Wrecking Crew) with bigger, perhaps brand new threats to follow. Or, like this issue, you start the hero in peril, building up to ultimate victory at the end -- like a Rocky movie. With any luck Omega Flight will end with Sasquatch single-handedly ending the war on terror, uniting all mankind in celebration.

Of course, to do that, all mankind would have to avoid buying Omega Flight.

Alright, I'm not usually one to use this forum as a means for baseless bickering, and comfortable with my tastes, it's rare I actually buy a bitter disappointment, but this is the exception that proves the rule. The issue itself isn't terrible, but if you've been following us over the past few weeks, you'll have seen the discussion about series beginnings including their opening storyarcs. [Captain Atom: Armageddon #1, Batman #608, Avengers #1, Nova #2, Avengers #4, DC: The New Frontier #2]

Omega Flight has become the measure of how not to start a series, particularly a title ultimately designated 'mini-series' status, but in truth there are a lot of other perpetrators. The posterchild of the painfully slow burn has to be Brian Bendis, whose original New Avengers work calls back to this in a big way, and in a solo perspective, Ultimate Spider-man also begins in much the same track. Unfortunately for USM, that sort of thin story telling has continued, while New Avengers has, for the time being, found it's footing somewhere in the late twenties.

Omega Flight gets the big red X for simple lack of progression in storytelling.
There's a lot of talk about 'writing for the [five/six issue] trade', and as a writer I can fully understand and support the notion of writing to a strength of the medium, but not like this. Not when you have your team on the cover, and meander through a single adventure that doesn't see the team forming until somewhere well past the half-way point.

Personally, I have some issues with Scott Kolins' output over the past few years, starting somewhere around covers on New Invaders and interiors for the ill-fated Marvel Team-Up. I couldn't falter Kolins for that, given that he, for the most part, competently tells what little story there is here, but it doesn't help matters.

Likewise, on the flip side, every time I see Mike Oeming's name on a Marvel character, I can't help but slump my shoulders when it's a writing credit.
Though essentially regarded for affectionately aping the Bruce Timm style, Mike Oeming's strengths as a story teller remain at the tip of a pencil. His gritty minimalist pencils are the kind of stylized approach I long to see at a Marvel drifting farther and farther from the early 00's that saw successful creative experiments like Grant Morrison's New X-Men, X-Statix, and various other wins.

I mention New Invaders, and really, that's probably the kind of book I'd hoped to find here. Not just because of the obvious US Agent connection, but because it felt like it had the opportunity to operate on the fringes of the Marvel universe, delivering stories with familiar characters, in slightly less familiar settings.

Never before has this been a more valuable juxtaposition than with the advent of the superhero Civil War. To be fair, Omega Flight does successfully differ itself from the superheroc conflicts of the core Marvel titles, but it does so with such frivolity that I'm positively surprised, and maybe even a little appalled by the titles selling far less than it.

What really prompted this entry was my browsing over sales figures for June 2007, which highlighted what I consider to be a disappointing fact of this particular industry. A fact that quality, at the end of the day, is meaningless, and that for all the talk of many, the money is not where the mouths are.

Some of the surprising titles selling less than Omega Flight: Iron Fist, She-Hulk, Spider-man Family, Detective Comics, Green Arrow, The Spirit, Checkmate, Catwoman, Ex Machina, Blue Beetle. That isn't even delving into the regularly neglected titles from publishers that aren't Marvel or DC. Poor form, direct market. Poor form.

I don't want to go over the top. I'm not about to blame Omega Flight for the numbers on those other books, because I think I've been scathing enough of it's legitimate faults, but I think it's worth setting in stone. This is not good comics writing. This is not even slowburn comics writing. This is not for me.

The Fight: 3.5 The Issue: 3
[Average first issue to a meandering, thin series. An unfortunate distraction from Mike Oeming's pencilling work. Some fun action for fans of the characters, but otherwise a book for the hall of shame. Sorry guys.]

THUNDERBOLTS versus WRECKING CREW
Justice... (Marvel comics)
Where: Thunderbolts #1 When: April 1997
Why: Kurt Busiek How: Mark Bagley

The story so far...
Earth's mightiest heroes are dead: Killed saving Manhattan and humanity from the threat of the dreaded Onslaught!
In their stead they leave a gaping justice-shaped hole and a population of villains ready to take advantage of the power vacuum.

Then, as if from nowhere -- Justice like lightning!
Enter the Thunderbolts! A team of mysterious heroes with strange and fantastic powers, led by the courageous WWII inspired patriot, Citizen V.

The Thunderbolts represent a new wave of protectors, tackling threats like the Hulk and the Masters of Evil! Or do they? Though these mysterious heroes have manipulated the media to cement their success, what dark secrets lie beneath their colourful costumes and masks? Maybe the Wrecking Crew will find out!

Previous Form:
Baron Zemo (#287): Defeated by Hulk, Captain America and Cable.
Songbird (#162): Present for multiple instances of the team.
Thunderbolts [#14]: Split results, defeating Jack Flag, with a loss to Hulk.
Wrecking Crew: Have not yet been featured on the site.

Tale of the tape...
Strength: The Wrecker 6 (Invincible)
Intelligence: Techno 6 (Genius)
Speed: Moonstone 4 (Olympian)
Stamina: Bulldozer 6 (Generator)
Agility: Citizen V 3 (Athlete)
Fighting Ability: Citizen V 4 (Trained Fighter)
Energy Powers: Moonstone 5 (Lasers)


Well, I've been busy-busy, but it's about damned time we get talking about The T-bolts, and the Wrecking Crew. Serious business, friends!

While not as prevelant as the Avengers or X-Men, we've had the opportunity to see a couple of incarnations of the Thunderbolts in action, and unless you've been living under a comics rock for ten years, you'll have some idea that the Thunderbolts generally have an association with some form of villainy.

Traditionally villains are not particularly cohesive or proficient fighting units, but the Thunderbolts were able to exceed the individuals, to become a superior fighting whole. Thus, let us deduce that motivation strengthens team dynamic, and therefore gives the Thunderbolts a numerical edge against their construction crew foes.

The Wrecker, aptly named leader of the Wrecking Crew, gained his powers through dumb-luck and mistaken identity, and has ever since had the enchanted power of an Asgardian. Like a good working stiff, he shares this power with his fellows in the gang; Thunderball, Bulldozer & Piledriver. Spreading the enchanted power not just to their chosen weapons, but also to each of their selves.

These days Wrecker does this without cost to himself, thanks to a little wax-on training with Ulik. This roughly equates to a quartet of badly dressed Thor-level villains, complete with construction based gimmicks, and a whole lot of average joe 'tude.

The Thunderbolt's find their key to victory in their versatility.
Under the strategic guidance of a disguised Baron Zemo - who is no fighting slouch - they are able to utilize their combination of strength, technology and super powers to deliver an encompassing attack on the one-note foes.

Likewise, the Thunderbolts, at least in this period, have the element of surprise. Most villains are completely unfamiliar with their techniques, while the former Masters of Evil have unique incite to the strategums and capabilities of their foes. This is perhaps the true edge, not seen against the likes of the Hulk. [Incredible Hulk #449]

The Math: The Thunderbolts (Total) The Wrecking Crew (Average)
The Pick: The Thunderbolts

What went down...
With New York City still reeling from the mass destruction unleashed by Onslaught, the Thunderbolts occupy their time dealing with the scavenging baddies, The Rat Pack. Having already defeated them, the team is quick to pose and rally in front of the press, mounting their efforts to again take the battle to the villainous clan.

The Rat Pack are quick to take to the skies, and even though they fully recognise the maneauver as an ambush, the Thunderbolts take chase, following the lowly crooks out of Manhattan toward Liberty Island.

There, they find themselves under the attack of an enchanted wrecking ball -- the calling card of Thunderball! His weapon destroys the V-wing, forcing the team to rally, those with capabilities of flight aiding those without.

Techno shows reluctance to battle hired crooks that might otherwise be counted as colleagues, but Citizen V quickly stems his remarks, masking them with the bold baratone of a charging superhero. Taking the cue, Atlas extends his size and strength to make an explosive landing on the island, bowling Wrecker and Piledriver, while Moonstone lends the assist against Bulldozer.

Apparently unaware of the history of the Citizen V monicker, Wrecker engages his team-leading counterpart in physical and mental combat. The Baron is more than ready to engage him in both, lithely avoiding a savage crowbar attack, with a razor edged retort of defeats passed.

While the rest of the teams duel it out, curious tourists on the island come under threat of falling rubble. Fortunately for them, Songbird is there to lend her sonic constructs as protective shields.
As Bulldozer barrels down on her, it is fortunate for Songbird that Mach-1 is on the scene to scoop up the threat with rocketting precision.

Continuing the theme of teamwork, Atlas comes to the aid of an overwhelmed Citizen V, using his impressive size and strength to clobber Wrecker into a self-made crater. Alas, Citizen V's warnings come too late, the cocky Atlas succumbing to a little teamwork from the away side.

As Atlas hurtles into the drink from the impact of Thunderball's strike, Meteorite does her best aerially to deal with Piledriver.

The super-powered menace uses his unusually large and powerful hands to wrench a piece of concrete from the battleground, using it as a massive projectile to send Meteorite hurtling into the Statue of Liberty like her namesake!

With the city watching on in horror, the Wrecker strikes at the base of the statue, sending a quiver up Liberty's spine. He challenges the star-spangle clad Citizen V to surrender, or face the consequences of being responsible for the symbol's destruction on national television.

Revelling in their apparent checkmate, the Wrecking Crew barely notice Mach-1 circling around in the air to fire spherical projectiles from the wrist mount of his armor. Each globe reaches it's target, stuffing the gobs of the cackling villains, before spewing forth noxious gas!

Under the direction of Citizen V, Songbird uses her sonic constructs to create forcefields around the Wrecking Crew's heads, trapping the gas that smothers them into unconsciousness.

His mouth shielded, the still intimidating Bulldozer mocks the Thunderbolts, but even as he speaks, his confidence begins to wither in direct response to the looming shadow from above.

A half-drowned and thoroughly ticked Atlas calls a grudge for Thunderball, but agrees to settle for the last man standing, thundering down a giant-sized fist that knocks Bulldozer back far into the city.

As the team reassembles, a strange noise begins to flood over the tiny spirited island. A sound recognizable, but yet definitely unfamiliar to the Thunderbolts.
The sound of the people cheering. The gratitude worthy of heroes.

The hammer...
Awww, ring the bell, sucka! School's back in, and the T-bolts be puttin' on a masta class of ass kickification, son!

... No good? Yeah, well, the Thunderbolts are the winners, whether my exploits as a jive talking web wacky work or not!
Bahlactus has been getting all the press for a while now, but lately respect has finally come home to roost for Secret Earths, and I've got to bring the hammer down on a whole lot of thanks to those guys.

Some of that respect finally motivated me to get on to this week's Ultimate Alliance entry, featuring the Wrecking Crew. For my estimation those guys have been about the only thing worth talking about from Mike Oeming's latest writing effort, which seems to have been downgraded from on-going to Omega Flight mini.

Even with the disgraceful slow burn and distinct lack of Mike Oeming: penciller, Omega Flight did open with some big action, and we'll probably get an opportunity to talk more about that series some time in the future.

What really knocks me on my ass here is the Thunderbolts.
While his work seems to have meandered somewhat through some easy standards; Warren Ellis has had many-a fan, myself included, several shades of jazzed over the villain-cum-hero team.

What's especially bizarre about finally discovering a love of the team is the fact that they're now a seasoned outfit, having a full decade of superheroics and internal squabblings under their belt. It was over ten years ago that we gazed upon that fateful scene where Citizen V revealed himself and his teammates as none other than The Masters of Evil! Wow!

Sadly, I was somewhat excited by the concept, but utterly bemused by the product itself. The characters were mostly second-tier villains that weren't obscure favourites, and the designs of the hero costumes, with the exception of Citizen V, inspired barely. It wasn't a book that lived up to the hype.

Some ten years later it's instability has been fully realized, but the formula has been refined in a world where superhero politics makes the lines between hero and villain all that much more blurred. The Thunderbolts exist now in a world almost inadvertently made for them, living their lives as heroes admist laws that willfully empower them to hunt down their costumed nemesis like dogs.

It's with hindsight that it can be debated that the Thunderbolts are by design a gauge of the zeitgeist of the Marvel universe. From their inception, they were the brilliantly simple response to the a power vaccuum left in the wake of Heroes Reborn, and now they again react to events in Civil War and redefinition of what a hero and villain is to the Marvel universe.

I don't mean to discount the work that went on between, and mark missing out on the so-called "fight club" years as a disappointment; but in an era still feeding and learning from the 'grim and gritty' progression of the eighties, maybe we can propose the Thunderbolts represent the final step in that exploration.

I'm confounded by regular references to the necessity of likeable and heroic characters in comics. It strikes me as foolish to claim entertainment and fiction require anything but the barest means of relating and approving.
I'd like to think maybe one day we will look back on books like Thunderbolts and recognise their contribution to our medium as the catalyst for motivated writing, over conventions of 'heroes', 'villains', and 'anti-heroes'.

And after that stretch of a musing, I'll wrap things up.
Still more Fantastic Fridays as we try to catch-up on June's delays, before reverting back to the original Friday Fight Nights. In the mean time, stay tuned!

The Fight: 4 The Issue: 4
NEXT WEEK: What evil lurks in the heart of The Lizard? The Spider-man knows!