BATMAN versus HARLEY QUINN

Once More, With FEELING! (DC)
Where: Harley Quinn #25 When: December 2002
Why: Karl Kesel How: Craig Rousseau

The Story So Far...
For four weeks Harley Quinn has staged a minor crime spree on the streets of Gotham City. Three times Batman has attempted to stop her -- and three times she and her Quinntets have managed to give him the slip!

It all started around the same time The Joker busted out of Arkham Asylum, but no one has seen hide nor hair of the so-called Clown Prince of Crime!

When Harley leads her boys on a jewelry store robbery it's another opportunity to score big and blow wind up The Batman -- or is it? All is not as it seems as Harley ups the stakes in an effort to become Batman's #1 arch-nemesis!

Tale of the Tape...
Strength: Batman 3 (Athlete)
Intelligence: Batman 5 (Professor)
Speed: Harley Quinn 3 (Athlete)
Stamina: Batman 5 (Marathoner)
Agility: Harley Quinn 4 (Gymnast)
Fighting: Batman 5 (Martial Artist)
Energy: Batman 4 (Arsenal)
Total: Batman 29 (Metahuman)

The Tape paints a fairly one-sided picture, so what could a screwball psycho with a jester hat possibly do to the dominant Dark Knight Detective? Plenty - if you make the mistake of under estimating Harley Quinn!

Dr. Harleen Quinzel may have surrendered herself to a life of criminal abandon, but this lapsed psychologist isn't as spaced out as she may seem!

In fact, so far her record against Batman is dead even, with a victory over he and Catwoman in Batman #613, and an unlikely team-up win with Batman against her beloved Joker, in Batman #663!

Being under estimated can be one of Harley Quinn's great tactical assets, helping upset her homicidal pseudo-hubby "Mistah J" and The Batman in equal measure. Her tenuous tether to the side of angels means switching sides is always an option, and it's also seen Batman exercise slightly more lenient methods when putting a stop to her misdemeanors.

Along with an arsenal of novelty weapons that includes canon-sized pistols and an oversized mallet; Harley Quinn is a physically gifted gymnast capable of out maneuvering opponents with speed and agility -- provided her mind stays on the job.

A tendency toward frivolity and madcap antics can quickly see Harley Quinn come unstuck, especially against superior fighters like Batman. Her comic mallet may pack a genuine wallop, but it did her no good in the service of protecting Joker from a highly-motivated Dark Knight in Batman #614!

History: Draw (1-1-0)
The Tape: Batman Ranking: Batman (#1)

What Went Down...
A shadow is cast over BT Jewelers as The Batman descends upon a robbery in progress. Frozen in the shade of his looming presence are the culprits: Harley Quinn and her two goons - Kenny Two-Bear and Buster!

Glass shatters. A black boot descends upon the back of Buster's head. A dark fist collides with Kenny Two-Bear's face at breakneck speed. It's all in a day's work for The Dark Knight Detective until a bag of loot smashes against his back!

Harley Quinn steps up to Batman with fists raised, and dares him to take on someone half his size! He lets out a sigh, underwhelmed by the vision of her daring dukes and the stolen tiara sat crookedly over one half of her jester's hat.

A dark glove glides past Harley Quinn's face as she side-steps the straight, workmanlike punch. A "cool, refreshin' breeze", she calls it, completely failing to guard herself from the elbow effortlessly snapped into her waiting jaw.

The chin check tells Harley he means business, but The Dark Knight isn't coming as hard as he would against The Joker. Harley rubs her sore chin and takes full advantage of the soft approach, reaching for a close bystander.

The barrel of her deadly pop gun rests at the frightened man's jaw as she asks Batman who his number one archenemy is. Even after Harley evaded him for three previous encounters, he still answers Joker. Harley is unamused.

While Harley's been putting the screws to Batman, her best guy Joker has been MIA. With her gun finding its way to the hostage's mouth, she asks Batman again: "Who'd you say is he biggest pain in your bat-behind right now?"

The Dark Knight answers through grit teeth that it's Harley Quinn and lets her go. All part of a plan to lure The Joker out of hiding by collaborating with Harley on a series of public stunts that dare him to come out of hiding!

The Hammer...
So, did you catch all that? It was a case of the ol' switcheroo as Batman and Harley Quinn went through the motions to stage an elaborate sting. In cahoots!

In exchange for Harley Quinn's co-operation she'd be spared jail time. All she had to do was stage a series of public crimes that culminated with her claim to be Batman's new #1 arch-foe. A challenge that would surely lure The Joker out of hiding, and allow Batman to shut down his inevitably violent return to crime.

Of course, we all know Harley gets a little weak at the knees when she's around "Mistah J". The plan quickly turns a corner when Joker does make contact, and Harley agrees to feed clues to Batman that'll play directly into Joker's plans.

It becomes a double-bluff when Batman anticipates the turn, but agrees to give Harley 72 hours to tease more clues out of The Joker in the hopes of stopping his big return scheme. The gag being that Joker doesn't actually have a big return scheme! The obscure clues he feeds through Harley Quinn are completely off-the-cuff, and in attempting to deduce his archenemy's next crime -- Batman unwittingly devises it for him!

Harley Quinn #25 is a great done-in-one plot that reads a lot like an episode of Batman: The Animated Series. Apropos, given Harley had only joined the DC Universe proper a few years prior, making the crossover from animation.

As most will know: Harley Quinn debuted with little explanation in the 1992 animated series episode The Joker's Favour. Tie-in comics featured more of her cartoon-universe adventures, before she made her first canon print appearance in the 1999 Batman: Harley Quinn special. A solo series soon followed in 2000.

The mid-nineties seemed to carry the burden of live-action Batman influences, but by the new millennium, the mainline Bat-books were drawing more from an iconic distillation found in early series of the Batman cartoon. Even the simplified Bruce Timm art style seemed to infiltrate into an increasingly present house style, which can be seen somewhat in Craig Rousseau's pencils here.

When Harley first meets with Joker sometime after the fight, the reunion literally starts out looking like the New Adventures of Batman & Robin. A romantic filter over the reality of a down-and-out Joker who's hiding away in a bunker unshaved and undressed. A fun reference to the good ol' days, for Harl'.

Those little details further enhance a great looking issue driven by its high-concept plot. Case in point: I like that one of Harley's new Quinntets is simply named Bob. This may or may not be a playful nod to Jack Nicholson's "#1 guy" Bob The Goon in the 1989 Batman movie. I like to think it is.

The early 2000s were a pretty great time to be reading Batman comics. I daresay the combination of classic and modern influences was approaching the definitive. I certainly think these were some of the best years for the Harley Quinn character, who offered another variation on the Gotham-bound flavor that was so good. Vivacious in costume, before it all went spring break gone wild.

We don't actually see the parting of combatants in today's featured fight. Given their secret alliance, it hardly seems to matter. This one will go on the books as a slightly complicated inconclusive result. Worth it to finally revisit a fun stand-alone issue from a great time.

If you'd like to experience this issue in full, and more from the era, you can check out the collected edition of Harley Quinn: Welcome to Metropolis via Amazon! By using the purchase link provided you'll help support the site at no extra cost to you!

You can find more featured fights by following links throughout this post, or by diving into the Secret Archive for a complete index of battles in order of publisher, series, and issue number.

You can also get daily links to fights by following Secret Wars on Infinite Earths on Twitter and Facebook. If you like what Secret Wars on Infinite Earths is about and want to see it prosper you can now support the project via Patreon.

Winner: Inconclusive (Draw)
#1 (--) Batman
#112 (+9) Harley Quinn
#570 (new) Bob (Quinntets) [+1 assist]
#571 (new) Buster (Quinntets) [+1 assist]
#572 (new) Kenny Two-Bear [+1 assist]

BATMAN & CATWOMAN versus HARLEY QUINN

Hush Chapter Six: The Opera (DC)
Where: Batman #613 When: May 2003
Why: Jeph Loeb How: Jim Lee

The Story So Far...
A mysterious new threat has insinuated itself into the life of The Batman, turning his world upside down with a single shot that sent him plummeting from the Gotham City skyline to the streets below.

Sustaining dangerous injuries, a barely conscious Bruce Wayne is inspired to direct his butler Alfred to childhood friend Thomas Elliot -- surgeon of considerable renown! The reunion of friends is a medical and social success! So much so, Dr. Elliot invites Bruce Wayne to accompany him to a performance of Pagliacci in the company of Selina Kyle.

Bursting in to hysterics - and out of the Pagliacci wardrobe - Harley Quinn makes a dramatic entrance at the opera! She's there to rob the rich glitterati in attendance, and sets her maniac gaze on the man pulling out a cell phone in the balcony: Thomas Elliot! With the stakes rising rapidly, Bruce and Selina excuse themselves, returning to the stage as their alter-egos: Batman and Catwoman!

Tale of the Tape...
Strength: Batman 3 (Athlete)
Intelligence: Batman 5 (Professor)
Speed: Catwoman 3 (Athlete)
Stamina: Batman 5 (Marathon)
Agility: Harley Quinn 4 (Gymnastic)
Fighting: Batman 5 (Martial Artist)
Energy: Batman 4 (Arsenal)


Harley Quinn is Dr. Harleen Quinzel: A former Arkham Asylum psychiatrist whose thesis in the psyche of crime and romance led to an infatuation with The Joker. Surrendering to her mind's darker desires, she dons a black and red harlequin suit, beginning her criminal career as The Joker's favourite girl!

Harley's academic insights and elective madness are underscored by her gymnastic athleticism. Where oversized mallets and guns fail -- acrobatics and agility pick up the slack! Speed and mobility therefore become her greatest skills in a physical mismatch such as a battle with Batman and Catwoman!

At this time, The Bat and The Cat have been made unwitting players in a grand scheme just starting to take shape. They've levelled their on-and-off rooftop antagonism to forge a full blown Gotham City alliance. When Catwoman was able to break from the manipulative influences of Poison Ivy [Batman #611]; Batman was there to assist her -- combating a mind-controlled Superman, as well [Batman #612]!

The longer it goes, the more the alliance turns up the heat on lingering romantic tensions. It's difficult to predict if romance strengthens Batman & Catwoman's partnership - or complicates it! It was playful flirtation in the chase shown in Solo #1, but created emotional volatility in another mind-control episode, involving Batman, in JLA #118! When the pair were at odds, Catwoman was often able to use the tone to get the better of Bats [eg; Batman: The Mad Monk #1].

Social dynamics are another way Harley Quinn could try to level the playing field! She tends to favor a ditzy, madcap approach to a life of crime, but her past as a studied psychiatrist can never be completely discounted. Batman's willingness to collaborate with morally ambiguous characters has introduced a lot of uncharacteristic uncertainty into the situation!

Batman and Catwoman have a famous history on opposite sides of the law. She's even maintained partnerships with Harley Quinn! Of course, that fact is a two-way street! Harley's found common ground with Batman in the past too, even choosing temporary alliances with The Dark Knight over her beloved Joker [eg; Batman #663]!

Of course, when psychology is too much work -- there are always henchman to even the odds! That's the case in this scenario, which finds Harley Quinn attempting to rob the rich at the opera. Will she get away with it? Most of our metrics point towards a no, but lets see exactly how it went down...

The Math: Batman Ranking: Batman (#1)

What Went Down...
Pushed from the balcony by Dr. Thomas Elliot -- Harley Quinn and her masked henchmen open fire at the opera box seats! Elliot sprints to reclaim his stolen mementos, while Selina Kyle and Dr. Leslie Thompkins take cover. The other man in attendance - Bruce Wayne - has already left to change for Act II!

The Batman glides toward the stage with wing-like cape fully outstretched! It provides a target for Harley Quinn, who wildly opens fire upon the descending figure -- hitting only the garb trailing behind him!

As he nears the stage, Batman tosses an arsenal of flash, smoke and mace grenades! The obscuring fog serves his priority of protecting the audience. His boot: beginning the offensive as it shatters one of the goons' masks on contact!

Machine gunfire sprays across stage-right as the goon recoils from Batman's devastating kick! Making ground, he throws his right leg at another nearby henchman. Batarangs whipped through the haze take down three more!

Confronting the harlequin ringleader: Batman squats to avoid another volley of bullets! This time Harley's aim is true, finding the sandbags dangling above the stage. Her bullets send them tumbling toward a Batman who is already nursing a serious head injury from a previous battle! The blow leaves Batman on his knees - dazed and grappling with the mistake of choosing a lighter cowl.

Harley refers to a partnership with Poison Ivy and a mysterious "script" she's considering deviating from. Somebody wants Batman alive, but the temptation to put a gun barrel to his head is too great. Good thing for him, somebody else wants him alive for altruistic reasons as well!

Catwoman leaps onto the stage - launching a fly kick into Harley's face!

The harlequin of crime tumbles into the set wall with a thud, mumbling about a Robin understudy. Catwoman takes extreme exception - slashing her talons across Harley's face as she rises from the ground. This time she goes through the set - sent smashing by Catwoman's stiff body kick!

Catwoman's claws slash through Harley's jester-like headdress, lopping one of the floppy limbs clean off! Harley uses the close quarters contact to make an escape - darting through Catwoman's legs, before vaulting off backstage boxes onto part of the stage!

With all the agility of her namesake, Catwoman keeps in step in the acrobatic harlequin. Being one step behind is enough to turn the tables, though. Whoever wants Batman alive had no objections to offing his "boy hostage" sidekick, or the "understudy" who's there in his place! Harley opens fire!

Taking a bullet to the shoulder in mid-flight -- Catwoman can't control her descent! She tumbles wildly through the turreted set and spills toward the stage. There, a Dark Knight waits to break her fall.

The audience erupts into applause, marvelling at Batman's ability to catch the woman. It was all just part of the show to them. As blood spills from her mouth, Catwoman chastises her ally for choosing to rescue her instead of catching the bad guy. She passes out as Dr. Thompkins arrives to offer medical aid.

The Hammer...
Batman may be standing by the end of the skirmish, but his hands are full with his wounded partner. Harley Quinn lost her fair share of henchmen, but she clearly got the better of both heroes. A surprise winner? Not exactly...

In the big picture, we're working backwards. Longtime readers of Secret Wars on Infinite Earths (and Issue Index divers) know we've already examined the fall out from this issue.

While Dr. Thompkins is tending to Catwoman's gunshot wound, Batman is chasing Harley Quinn. This leads him to run into The Joker in an opera back alley: A final page sting that sets up their showdown in Batman #614! All of the players from today's feature fight find their way into that alley - Catwoman included. Follow the link to see how it all went down!

Hush has been a recurring touchstone throughout the life of Secret Wars on Infinite Earths. I'm reluctant to hold the story up in high esteem, but I cannot deny its staying power as an encapsulation of the basic Batman experience.

At the time, it was a re-energizing experience for Batman comics. A back to basics approach that seemed to empower the vision of a quality creative team over broad editorial mandates. Large scale "event" crossovers like No Man's Land had started to overwhelmed the outward impression of what Batman comics were about. As a 12 issue story, Hush was very much a precursor to the overbearing "event" comics steering the past few years - but by containing it within one on-going series, with a simple objective, it felt ironically refreshing.

The appointment of Jeph Loeb as writer really struck a powerful chord! His past work with Tim Sale had been a well crafted revelation - giving us two landmark maxi-series in the Batman canon. The thought that this quality approach might entrench itself firmly within monthly continuity was an exciting prospect!

Of course, the much anticipated return of Jim Lee as a mainstream superhero penciller created a lot of buzz! His approach to rendering characters drew favorably from an iconic past, infusing it with a strong modern sensibility. Previews of his character designs were a tasty entrée! This may have been Lee at his very best. His work was more sharply focused on storytelling, and an intelligent, modern-definitive approach to character design that was permeating superhero comics in the early 2000s. A seemingly writer-driven focus on ideas, without the excesses of unmotivated visual spectacle.

Unfortunately, Hush didn't hit the storytelling highs of the Sale collaborations.

Like The Long Halloween and Dark Victory before it, the story undertakes a twelve issue tour through Batman's rogues gallery. A selection of Gotham villainy, effected together as a concurrent gauntlet with an overarching mystery.

I don't have any real complaints about the basic premise, but it may have been strained by a third go around, impacted by different concerns for where the characters are coming from, and going to. The Sale stories took advantage of the changing of the guard in Gotham's criminal underworld - the rise of the so-called "freaks" to take the city away from old families and mobs. More reactions than Hush, where the rogues are puppets in a more broad plot.

The guessing game of who's manipulating events against Batman certainly isn't as compelling or veiled as The Holiday Killer mysteries. This could be excused for what seems to be a different intent: The creation of a new arch-villain.

Fortunately, the story always has the gauntlet to fall back on, and it's hard not to enjoy an adventure through the super-villains. It slightly overwhelms Batman #613, but giving Harley Quinn a spotlight is certainly a fun prelude to the main event entrance of Joker in the next issue.

Harley Quinn is ultimately the reason we're all here. August on Secret Wars on Infinite Earths is all about the stars of the Suicide Squad movie - now in theatres! Margot Robbie stars as Harley Quinn - one of our recent Heroes of the Week, and today's feature fight winner!

If you'd like to find more pieces of the Hush puzzle, more Harley Quinn, or more of the Suicide Squad characters - check out the Issue Index Archive! If you're ready to read the whole story yourself, take advantage of the Amazon purchase link provided for your convenience! Doing so helps support the site, as well!

Stay tuned for the next Friday Night Fights, which is sure to be an enchanting interlude!

Winner: Harley Quinn
#104 (+224) Harley Quinn
#1 (--) Batman
#30 (-1) Catwoman

HERO OF THE WEEK: HARLEY QUINN (DC)
Real Name: Harleen Quinzel
First Appearance: Batman: The Animated Series Ep. 22 (September, 1992)
Fight Club Ranking: #328

Featured Fights:
- vs BATMAN: Batman #614 (Jun 2003)
- vs BATMAN: Batman #663 (Apr 2007)

So they're going to give The Joker a wacky, gal pal sidekick...

I wonder what the backlash would be like if that were a leading headline today. I wonder what it would've been like back in 1992! There really wasn't any time to huff and puff about an intrusion on classic comics mythology! Harley Quinn clapped and whistled her way into the Batman universe with little to no warning. She even appeared without explanation! Just a harlequin-suited, sycophantic sounding board (and accomplice) for the legendary Clown Prince of Crime!

More moll than sidekick, but more Daffy Duck than Betty Boo -- Harley Quinn fit right in with the blackboard art deco world of comics-inspired Batman: The Animated Series!

It's not hard to see how the character would be quickly accepted, ultimately embraced. Brimming with more personality than the usual costume-appropriate henchwoman; Harl' completed a double act that gave Joker somebody to play off, while offering plenty of her own schtick to boot! The signs were there in her debut appearance of Episode 22, but things only got better from there.

When DC Comics finally made the call in 1999 to fold her into the Batman comics proper - history was made! Rare is it that a cross-media contribution can thrive in the comic book world, but her 2001 on-going series cemented the character as must-read! With fantastic, madcap adventures that made use of the exciting "new" addition, Harley Quinn's comic book credentials were secured!

Flash forward to 2016 and Harley Quinn is now a marquee character lending name value to the oddball cadre of the live-action theatrical Suicide Squad.

For that reason alone she'd be our Hero of the Week, but there's clearly more at play here than a live-action debut. Harley Quinn is becoming an all-out pop culture phenomenon! A slapstick sub-cultural icon splashed across the mainstream with similar notes to Deadpool! DC Publisher Jim Lee is even being quoted as calling her one of the company's "four pillars" -- eclipsing The Joker himself!

Of course, much like Jared Leto's Joker [HOTW 08/01/2016]; the Harley Quinn seen in Suicide Squad (and related merchandising) isn't exactly the character that fans originally fell in love with.

For me, the loss of that iconic harlequin costume is a real shame. Sexed up t-shirt and hotpants just don't speak to the heart of the character I grew to enjoy. It's a different kind of crazy, marketed to a different kind of fan. At least some of that blame can fall on Hollywood, whose tenuous relationships with "reality" and superheroes have never been spectacular. Like a lot of long time readers, I pine for the days when comics were confident in the culture they'd built up over many decades. Alas; the iconic costume started disappearing from the comics even before The New 52 muddied the waters.

I'll be very interested to see where Harley Quinn ends up next, and how Rebirth and further cross-media properties further shape the character. Will she remain the fourth pillar alongside the trinity of DC legends: Superman, Batman & Wonder Woman? If initial reaction to the film is anything to go by, they're certainly in mutual company. We'll be watching.

Can't get enough Harley Quinn? Be watching Friday Night Fights as we celebrate the Suicide Squad in updates throughout the month of August!

<< Hero of the Week 08/15: Deadshot        [Home]       Hero of the Week 08/01: Joker >>

BATMAN versus JOKER
Hush Chapter Seven: The Joke (DC)
Where: Batman #614 When: June 2003
Why: Jeph Loeb How: Jim Lee

The Story So Far...
When a child heir is kidnapped by Killer Croc the seeds of a plot to undo Gotham City's dark knight protector become unwittingly revealed. Batman's greatest villains are about to be manipulated by an unknown assailant, whose war of strategy against the hero proves deeply personal.

The next chapter in Batman's struggle emerges in the unlikliest of venues, during a night at the opera in the company of friends; Selina Kyle, Dr. Thomas Elliot, and Dr. Leslie Thompkins. When Dr. Elliot resists Harley Quinn's attempts to loot the crowd of their valuables, including a jade ring given to him by his deceased mother, he directs the attentions of the villain's gang on their balcony seats.

While Elliot pursues his heirloom; Wayne and Kyle emerged in their costumed alter-egos as Batman and Catwoman. Their battle with Harley Quinn earns the applause of the crowd, but when Batman tracks the fleeing villainess, he enters the alleys behind the theatre to find his arch-nemesis, the Joker, squatting over the gunshot inflicted body of his childhood best-friend, Thomas Elliot.

Tale of the Tape...
Strength: Batman 3 (Athlete)
Intelligence: Batman 5 (Professor)
Speed: Batman 3 (Athlete)
Stamina: Draw 5 (Marathon)
Agility: Batman 4 (Gymnast)
Fighting Ability: Batman 5 (Martial Artist)
Energy Power: Batman 4 (Arsenal)


- After witnessing the street murder of his parents, the young Bruce Wayne's destiny was forever shaped to be one dedicated to an ideal. Having spent his formative years studying the various sciences, martial arts, and crime fighting techniques, Bruce is ultimately inspired to become the one-man war on the criminal element in Gotham City: Batman.

Perhaps Batman's greatest power is the millions inherited from his industrialist parents, and the various facilities that came with that. They prove crucial in the design and construction of his many weapons, which are typically non-lethal, and have a variety of uses.

Complimented by his keenly strategic mind is Batman's expertise in the martial arts. He is extensively trained in multiple fighting styles, and commonly regarded to be one of the greatest hand-to-hand fighters in the world. He is also extremely proficient in general urban warfare.

- It has been claimed that he was the victim of one very bad day, which ended with a fall into a vat of chemicals that bleached his skin, dyed his hair, and twisted his face into a permanent grin. The truth of his name and origins remain unknown, but as the Joker, he is one of the most feared killers in Gotham City.

Joker is known to have an aptitude for creating and working with toxins and other chemicals, favouring trademark concoctions that induce uncontrolled laughter, facial distortion, and often, death. Joker is also a proficient strategist, who is said to regularly reinvent his identity as a part of his vendetta against Batman.
The Joker, though not a skilled fighter, is shown to have an inhuman capacity for pain tolerance and recovery.

Additional: While Batman has one of the most impressive lists of nemesis, few characters reach the status of Joker as his arch-villain. Joker's rivalry with Batman has arguably produced the definitive vision of the classic comic book supervillain, defined by; false deaths, personal attacks (deaths), trap and baits, and a continuing relationship unlikely to be resolved.

Joker's unpredictability often means Batman is forced into a responsive position. The Dark Knight's dedication to non-lethal justice is the means by which Joker maintains his villainous presence, with an uncanny knack for escape.
Despite their continuous rivalry, it is Batman who has a distinct advantage over Joker in physical confrontations, and regularly dishes out defeat accordingly. [Examples include; Detective Comics #781 and Batman #663].

History: Batman (2-0-0)
Math: Batman Ranking: Batman (#2)

What Went Down...
He knows the moment he sees him, that Dr. Thomas Elliot is already dead.
Enraged; Batman's mind opens to decades of death and violence, filling his fists with a vengeance that recalls the Joker's crimes against Barbara Gordon, Sarah Essen, Jason Todd, and the many nameless victims who've suffered.

The Dark Knight is unsympathetic to Joker's objections. His fists spray the blood of the clown prince with an uncharacteristic ferocity, bordering dangerously on what seems like a total loss of control, but the Batman is in control.

He pummels the Joker with a barrage of expert punches, each more devestating than the last, and unanswered by the weedy killer. For every uppercut, cross, and hook, the Joker pleads with Batman, through broken teeth and blood.

Unable to stand any longer, Joker buckles under the raging bull that is the Batman. With his enemy floored, Batman pins him down and wraps his powerful hands around the spindly neck of the chalkfaced killer. With a twisted grin, the Joker whispers his innocence to a Batman, stone faced.

The Joker's partner in crime, Harley Quinn, lurks into the alley from the nearby theatre exit. Wielding an oversized mallet, she and Joker lock eyes to hatch an unspoken ambush, but the Batman is more than prepared. He rolls to the side, allowing Quinn to clobber the Joker with with her weapon.

Batman sends Harley Quinn hurtling across the alley with a stiff kick, before returning his stoic attentions to the Joker, who continues to deny responsibility for the death of Thomas Elliot. Batman slams him against a wall, only to feel a whip wrap around his neck to jerk him away.

Catwoman, injured in the previous battle with Harley Quinn and her goons, does her best to pull the weight of the Batman away from Joker. Having developed a romantic relationship with the dark knight, Catwoman offers up her bitter intent to do everything she can to prevent the raging Batman from commiting acts regrettable. Despite their closeness, her words fall on deaf ears.

Batman yanks Catwoman toward him by the length of her whip, but the lithe vixen is able to use her momentum to slash the Bat across the chest with claws in her gloves. She emplores Batman to consider what he'd do if the roles were reversed, but the silent dark knight is submerged in regreat, recalling the death of Jason Todd, a milestone that has informed his every decision since.

Intent on punishing the Joker for his constant crimes, Batman takes advantage of Catwoman's wound, putting her down with a simple palm strike. He rests her gently out of harms way and thinks about how easily he could lose her, too.
With the image of her broken body in his mind, Batman makes his decision: "He dies tonight by my hand."

Attempting to flee, Joker is quickly engulfed in the shadow of the bat.
Batman pins him to the ground once more, allowing only screams of terror to escape from beneath the canopy of his long dark cape.

An authorative voice echoes through the rain, firing shots into the alley that clip the Batman's arm and cowl. "Stand up and put your hands in the air. The next shot, I WILL drop you." The descending voice of reason holds a gun to the back of the Batman's head and tries to remind him of the virtues that have prevented his descent into the madness that he combats. He is Jim Gordon, former GCPD commissioner, and lifelong ally of the Batman.

Gordon compells Batman to think, only to reach the chilling realisation that he has thought about his actions. As if resigned to the Batman's will Gordon makes a final empassioned speech, declaring the thin line that seperates the Gotham vigilante from costumed killers like the Joker. He is successful in finally talking the Batman down, but not relieving his sense of responsibility.

The Hammer...
Successful in overcoming Joker, Harley Quinn, and Catwoman - your winner and new Infinite Wars champion -- Batman!

That's right! After slipping from the top of our cumulative rankings some sixteen months ago; July's 'Dark Knight-sponsored entries have seen the original number one return to the top! Six months of the Spider-Boycott hasn't hurt the Bat-cause, but does this mean a return to the Season 2006 dominance of Batman? Stay tuned to Super Stock updates (and tape stats) to watch as the drama of the rankings resumes!

With the first appearance of the Joker arriving in 1940's Batman #1; the feud between the dark knight and his clowning arch-rival has become one of the most storied battles in comics. It's a relationship that has spawned an empire of cross media success, including a second feature film outing in this month's The Dark Knight; starring Christian Bale and the late Heath Ledger in the respective roles.

Directly inspired by the adventures of pulp fiction and serial films of the 1940's; the Batman's trials began with bashful confrontations against fairly standard criminals. It was, however, the emergence of macabre characters like the Joker who gave birth to the arch-nemesis as we know it today, not as an evasive foe, but as a supporting character within the genre.

Customary of grim tales of the time was the concluding death of an evil-doer, but for Bill Finger and Bob Kane, this proved merely an obstacle through which they would create a standard. This desire to revisit colourful and memorable villains quite immediately created a situation now regarded with chagrin by many fans of the modern industry -- the false death.

Joker's many murderous returns from near-death situations made his duel with Batman a veritable archetype of the genre, culminating in less permanent solves, like Arkham Asylum, which first appeared under the pen of Denny O'Neal during the grim and gritty period of the seventies and eighties. As his criminal acts became increasingly horrific, the plausibility of Joker's constant return and escape from Arkham created new questions, which arguably remain unsolved.

In reviewing the confrontation in Batman #614, I wanted to look at a question that's probably going to be as relevant to longterm diehards as it is to relative neophytes who've just seen the film: Why doesn't Batman just kill the Joker?

As with Batman, the Joker has gone through many iterations, but the question rests at least on the implication of a Joker who is sufficiently lethal. I tend to think it's modern interpretations that justify the question the best, as Batman delves deeper into increasingly subdued settings, and faces plausible evils.

Because of these many interpretations [and the history just recapped to a questionable quality] it's very difficult to attribute any single reason for the Batman's restraint, and in the context of Joker, Jeph Loeb explores this lethal imperative on the terms of their longstanding relationship.

Quite suitably, the Christopher Nolan films have made quite a good effort to present both sides of the argument. It was Batman Begins that helped distill the character's motivations as they had become through the benefit of decades of refining, presenting a clearer depiction of Bruce Wayne as a man attempting to create an incorruptable symbollic structure for good.

[Christian] Bale's Batman defines himself by these broad ideals, benefitting from a slightly more balance psyche than popular interpretations of the comic book Dark Knight. In the four-colour medium the character is free to indulge much bigger, more fantastic ideals, where his morality and sense of responsibility becomes the spiral point for the Gotham villains to emerge.

The Dark Knight appears to reinstate a sense of individual, if tangential, motivation in the Joker as an independent entity. He is undeniably attracted to the Batman, but appears as a villain with a proclivity for chaos, and intrinsic homicidal tendencies to be played out en masse.
Bruce Wayne's larger-than-life push to be a force for good, without becoming an executioner, justified Batman in the first film, but the sheer scale of Joker's madness quite realistically reconfirms doubt over Batman's non-lethal tactics.

It's a fairly curious thing.
While off the page the answer might simply be a corporate American ideal to present Batman in the moral company of his superhuman counterparts -- the reality reflect by world law enforcement is an increasingly militant presence, forced in greater number to deal with life and death situations.

Geoff Johns has done well to introduce this concept to the Green Lantern mythology, granting even sometimes war-time pacifist, Hal Jordan, the license to do something previously attributed solely to the vengeance of Parallax.
So, as comics continue to confront the reality of a dark world, why not Batman? Why is the distinction between crippling and maiming sufficient for a man so staunchly against lethal force? I might redirect you to previous discussions about our totem of justice, and ponder the subject for our last Dark Knight Friday, where maybe I'll be ready to discuss the matter with more focus.

Oh, and the punchline? Joker didn't kill Tommy Elliot!

The Fight: 5 The Issue: 5.5

If you want to know more about Batman's attempt to kill the Joker; Gordon's intervention; or the secret war waged against the Dark Knight by a new foe - Hush - then you should head over to Amazon and pick up the trades! The top ten selling storyarc is the perfect way for fans of The Dark Knight to initiate themselves into the world of the Batman, as he is forced to tackle some of his greatest foes (and allies) in an effort to uncover the true identity of Hush! If you don't like what you see, but are looking to get your Bat-fix on, then be sure to check out the Amazonian Gift Shoppe for more legends of the dark knight! Collections featuring most issues reviewed in the Secret Archives are available, and by using purchase links provided, you help sponsor the Infinite Wars!

MONTHLY PUNCH-UP #16 (April 2007)
BATMAN versus THE JOKER
The Clown at Midnight (DC)
Where: Batman #663 When: April 2007
Why: Grant Morrison How: John Van Fleet & Todd Klein

Quick Fix...
If you haven't heard the hook for Batman #663, you probably haven't been around the comic scene the past few months, because while Grant Morrison writing Batman might not be news anymore -- Grant Morrison shaking things up most certainly is.

Rather ironically, this issue features something not seen in mainstream comics for probably a decade, and that's prose. The last time I remember seeing this attempted in a major on-going series it was a David Michelinie flip feature in Spectacular Spider-man #220.

So anyway, how is that ironic? Well, it was one of a string of uncanny coincidences between the major comics world and the small press musings of yours truly. Of course, in truly frustrating fashion nothing came of my work, but that doesn't mean we didn't all have fun! (Crooked Yellow Grin, Adventures of Mr. Cairo).

Moving along, there's more to this book than meets the eye.
Not only does it have the unique feature of throwing back to the pulp origins of the medium, but it also features artwork by John Van Fleet, whose unique CG images are integrated into the sketchy presentation of the book.

Given the nature and setting of the tale, and the stagnant, inhuman maquettes that represent the humans, I actually think there's a suitably eerie, almost Silent Hill-esque nature to the artwork that lends a great deal to the story.
Positioning me in contrast to most critics of the issue.

I guess what really worked against this book, for me, was an issue of style.
I'm not a big prose fan in general, but the overly elaborative kinds of prose, that spend an excessive amount of time on descriptions of descriptions tend to get to me, and while this book isn't terminal, it's certainly the bulk of the first few pages.

If you can navigate your way beyond Morrison's wordy allusions, you'll eventually crack a pretty decent Joker story, which is perhaps unfortunately for those interested, tonally removed from the bulk of the run.
For me, I actually like the shift. Morrison and DC's generally friendlier take on the Batman character isn't for me, so this book takes it to a place that was much more inclined to delight me. It's more along the lines of what I'd probably like to see from the Joker too, more or less. Removed from the homicidal trickster we even saw in Paul Dini's recently acclaimed work. [Detective Comics #826]
Although, one of the conceits of the story is to attempt to incorporate that, and other takes on the Joker, into Morrison's theory of the 'super-personas,' previously established in his Arkham Asylum mini-series.

We join the fix with Joker recovered in a mental hospital, and killing his way through the staff after rebirthing himself and rescarring his face.
This follows on from events earlier in Morrison's run, where a broken Gotham police officer shot Joker in the face with a shotgun. Hence rehabilitation and facial reconstruction...

Harley Quinn joins the Joker having followed a series of clues, but what she doesn't count on is the shift in "Mistah Jay"'s personality. She doesn't count on the fact that he has grown tired of her and her cutesy ways.

She fullfils her purpose, luring the Batman to the scene of Joker's reawakening as something horrible and terrifying, blissfully unaware that Batman is just there to witness her death. By killing the one he loved Joker can ascend to being something far more than human, in his own demented estimation, at least.

Batman, understanding the language of the Joker, challenges Harley's disbelief.
The Joker holds her with a razor blade to her neck, and through broken tissue Joker muffles something about it being better if Harley looked more like he.

Harley submits and the Batman is forced to pounce.
They land on a gurney, the Joker's wirey frame collapsing in a tangle before shifting itself back into place like it always does. The Batman uses his superior fighting skills to subdue the clown prince of crime, and attempts to make it clear that it wasn't he who shot him.

Joker plunges the razor into Batman's forearm and drags it down across the palm of his glove. Ignoring the pain the hero snaps the blade defiantly in his bleeding hand, and follows through to drive his elbow into the pale stitched chin beneath him.

Joker continues to bite and snap at his arch-nemesis, spitting bits of the poisonous goo that courses through his veins and vacilitated his escape.
Harley Quinn sobs in the corner like a child witnessing another night of violence between her once loving parents.

Batman sternly denies the Joker's attempts to leave, "You're going nowhere."
The two rivals stare each other down. "If you don't turn around and walk back to your padded cell, I'll put you down like a dog," Batman says. "I promise."

Joker slurs something about red and black, like a bat, but Batman cannot make it out. Joker surrenders, acknowledging that he could never kill the straight man of his deranged comedy routine. Then, with that confession, he charges at him screaming like something unholy and deranged. Something stops him in his tracks, though.

"You gotta stop ignoring me, Mistah Jay."

Harley Quinn returns the favour to her jilted lover with rosey blood red stains from a bullet bouquet.
The Batman drags the broken murderer by his twisted arm, deeper into the labyrinthine hospital. The cycle ends anew.

The Fix: 5.5 The Issue: 6
Winner: Harley Quinn & Batman

The Top Five...
#1 Sub-Mariner (new) (new) (Marvel)
Class: [UBER-hero] Last Opponent: [Sue Storm (wink wink)]
Win Percentage: [100%] Features: [MULTIPLE times]

Having spent his career as the measuring stick by which Aquaman is ridiculed, Sub-Mariner enters the top five purely by sheer force of awesomeness. His abilities include flight, super-strength, and so much power and manliness, he doesn't even require pants.

Truth be told, the greatest differences between the surface world and Atlantis have revolved around the absurdity of pants. Namor is so incredibly awesome he does not even require such embarassingly modest garments as trousers.
He scoffs Aquaman, and his stupid trousers. Only for the utmost special occasions will he be so gracious as to lower himself to the modesty of meer mortals.

Namor will continue to feature heavily on the website, because of his fantastic power. All who do not submit to the will of the Sub-Mariner shall fear the adamantium smearing sting of his super-powered fist. A fist that is invulnerable to the tiny chompers of pathetic vermin like pirhanna. IMPERIUS REX!!!

#2 Captain America (RE) (4) (Marvel)
Class: [SUPER soldier] Last Opponent: [Momma Stark]
Win Percentage: [99%] Features: [50]

Even dead Captain America just keeps bringing it. Why?
Because he's Captain freaking America, bitch. He was training little kids in panties for war before yo moma was even born!

Dense? Retarded? He's the god damn super soldier! You don't stop him with a bullet to the shoulder, and a round or two to the gut from a brainwashed ex-girlfriend! Lead IS a mineral Captain America's steely body requires!
He's absorbs them bullets, and then craps out a collection of commemorative coins featuring some of the greatest Presidents starting with the likes of Washington and Lincoln, all the way up to Morgan Freeman!

Cap's bringing it on Secret Earths, and you better recognise!

#3 Rainbow Mika (new) (new) (Capcom)
Class: [Wrestler Mallow] Last Opponent: [Zangief's face]
Win Percentage: [78%] Features: [2]

Even though we might all admire some of R. Mika's other qualities, you've got to give it up to the wrestling chick who can get business done!

It was International Woman's Day and Mika was representing after gay icon, Zangief, grabbed her ample hynie in a none too subtle feature from the boys at UDON. Oh, those wacky noodle-eating characters! What will they do next?!

Maybe we'd grab it too, but for the tenacity to launch your butt at a hairy, seven foot tall Russian, R. Mika makes her way straight into the top five! HOT!!!

#4 Kraven the Hunter (new) (new) (Marvel)
Class: [Hunter] Last Opponent: [Dirt]
Win Percentage: [100%] Features: [1]

Actually, Sergei Kravinoff doesn't deserve to be in the top five, but once we admitted Captain America he cited precedent. What were we supposed to do people? It was let him into the top five, or he would pull a Zangief, and frankly, I don't much fancy launching myself butt-first at a frisky Russian. No offense, Mika.

Rawr!

#5 Black Adam (new) (new) (DC)
Class: [Human/Atlantean Hybrid] Last Opponent: [Earth]
Win Percentage: [100%] Features: [0]

I don't know if anyone's been watching DC's 52 lately, but it raises a valid and interesting point that I'd like to discuss here.

Even though we debate and question things like whether or not Captain America ever gunned down a stinkin piece of Ratzi scum during the Second World War. That's fair enough. But at the end of the day, even Cap tells us it isn't cool to go around killing people. It was the forties, and it's just not kosher anymore. You should also call them "Jewish-Americans", too. And pay them when they draw your comics... But I digress...

Black Adam, crazy world leader that he is, just tore through a nation.
He probably killed in the millions, and among those were probably just a lot of hot headed innocents who didn't take too kindly to being rained down upon with broken bones and bodily organs.

And you know what? Even Batman can't top that.
I LOVE BLACK ADAM!!!

Super Stock...
Alright, we've got a ship to run here, so I'm going to pansy out a little bit.
Since we overlooked the occasion last year, I thought it might be nice to indulge in the antics of April Fool's Day. Usually I don't bother, because we're fooling noone, but hey. Let's have a little bit of fun!

For those hyper ventilating now as they try to calculate the 2007 top five for this month, allow me to offer some relief: #1 Spider-man; #2 Batman; #3 Ghost Rider; #4 Wolverine; #5 Angel.

I'd love to tell you that last one was a joke, but alas, the numbers do not lie.
And now, on to the cumulative results, where the unthinkable has finally happened. After fifteen months of dominance since his first appearance, Batman is dethroned as the number one fighting superhero on Secret Earths!

1. Spider-man (+1) (M)
2. Batman (-1) (DC)
3. Wolverine (-) (M)
4. Iron Man (-) (M)
5. Daredevil (-) (M)
6. Superman (+1) (DC)
7. Captain America (+1) (M)
8. Hulk (-2) (M)
9. Elektra (+4) (M)
10. Steel (+8) (DC)
18. Ghost Rider (new) (M)
19. Venom Symbiote (-10) (M)
20. Beast (-) (M)
21. Thor (-11) (M)
22. Sub-Mariner (-1) (M)
23. Bullseye (+47) (M)
25. Storm (-1) (M)
29. Human Torch (+1) (M)
38. Black Cat (new) (M)
56. Winter Soldier (new) (M)
57. Black Bolt (new) (M)
58. Rainbow Mika (new) (Cap)
59. Sakura (new) (Cap)
64. Venom [Mac Gargan] (-30) (M)
65. Angel (+2) (M)
75. She-Hulk (-7) (M)
76. The Punisher (-23) (M)
77. The Trapster (-13) (M)
89. Colossus (-4) (M)
91. Natasha Irons (-9) (DC)
95. Photon (-3) (M)
96. Radioactive Man (+7) (M)
123. Starfox (new) (M)
124. Penance (new) (M)
125. Swordsman (new) (M)
128. Wonder Woman (-9) (DC)
135. Dr. Strange (new) (M)
136. Songbird (+25) (M)
137. Moonstone (+23) (M)
138. Tigra (-32) (M)
210. Slam Bradley (new) (DC)
211. Lex Luthor (new) (DC)
212. Echo (new) (M)
213. Dan Hibiki (new) (Cap)
214. Zangief (new) (Cap)
215. Jack Flag (new) (M)
221. Magneto (-17) (M)
222. Brick (-17) (DC)

The Hammer...
So, there you have it folks, we wrap up another month and head into a new one. Being unwell last week, I have slipped behind a little bit. I've got some scanning to do, but I'll be getting Marvel Monday's Fin Fang Foom post up ASAP.

Rather than delay things further trying to make up the Wednesday post that was lost, expect to see that rewrite bumped to this coming Wednesday. Apologies to all who logged on Wednesday to find that.

It was the biggest week in the site's history, not only featuring three times the entries, but also three times the visitors! Keeping the hit counter ticking over is the only incentive I have for this site, so I appreciate that a great deal!
I've been pleased to see the site even being referenced as a resource, as I hoped it would. It popped up recently on the Spawn.com message boards, although, if anyone is reading, it was actually an incorrect reference.

Later this month we'll probably do a feature on the issue of She-Hulk where she relieves Titania of the Power Gem, just to help anyone out who's wondering about how the events of the new Illuminati series have unfolded.

I'm also hoping to inject much more DC into April!
May will have a special twist that's again tilted toward Marvel, so I really feel an obligation to those of the DC Nation who are logging in to follow their guys.
Especially now that Batman has finally been toppled from the number one spot on the cumulative rankings. That's right folks, that was NOT an April Fool's gag!

It's interesting to note that Spider-man took the top spot (statistically) with the same amount of features as Batman, so you can't even call favourtism on that one. Of course, it brings a whole new flavour to the argument that Batman is too unbeatable. Just one of the many twists we hope to uncover during day-to-day fun here on Secret Wars on Infinite Earths.

Going back to traffic, I have to throw a big shout out to a couple websites who have been kind enough to throw a link up to us, and in turn showed up on the referrers list! The Four Color Media and Comic By Comic!
Each are fantastic blogsites in their own right, and I greatly appreciate their support. Inter-relations seems to be a big part of becoming part of the blogosphere, and while we're still getting snubbed by the 'bigger' blogs, I like to think this is a move in the right direction. Thanks guys!

I'm now officially out of money and energy, so I'm going to wrap this up.
Some updates I'm looking forward to here, so fingers crossed we can keep the ship running smoothly. And hey, feel welcomed to drop a comment.
In the mean time, don't believe the hype. We were Friday Fight Night before it was cool!

BONUS!: Hey, also! If you didn't notice, we added some fun interactive games to the page! See how many Avengers and X-Men you can name in ten minutes!
Is it as easy as you think? Can you do it without cheating? Fun!
If I find the time, we might get some some more of that action!

March Hit Count: [3350/8558] (+2089)