NEW WARRIORS & THOR versus JUGGERNAUT

The New Warriors (Marvel)
Where: Thor #412 When: Mid-December 1989
Why: Tom DeFalco How: Ron Frenz & Joe Sinnott

The Story So Far...
As Loki convinces the ranks of the world's deadliest super-villains to exchange resources & opponents in a series of coordinated "Acts of Vengeance" -- he saved the most unstoppable surprise challenger for his half-brother Thor!

When Juggernaut is plucked from maximum security confinement in England's Crossmoor Prison and teleported back to New York City -- he's more than happy to lay waste to an unprepared God of Thunder who soon succumbs to his might!

Now the only thing standing in the way of Juggernaut and Loki's supreme victory over Thor is an all-new ragtag group of youths called The New Warriors!

Tale of the Tape...
Strength: Juggernaut 6 (Invincible)
Intelligence: Night Thrasher 4 (Tactician)
Speed: Nova 7 (Lightspeed)
Stamina: Juggernaut 7 (Unstoppable)
Agility: Speedball 4 (Gymnast)
Fighting: Night Thrasher 4 (Trained)
Energy: Nova 5 (Lasers)
Total: Nova 33 (Super)

The New Warriors are: Night Thrasher, Marvel Boy, Nova, Namorita, Firestar, and Speedball, with Thor.

Thor met his match against an unstoppable force in the previous issue, but lucky for him -- there's a new generation of New Warriors hittin' the streets to make it safe for regular folk like you & me - and freshly clobbered gods of thunder!

The next wave of justice is led by Night Thrasher, aka; Dwayne Taylor: heir to the Taylor Foundation, whose fortune allows him to design & build advanced armor and weaponry. He's a skilled fighter and tactician, hellbent on fighting crime, who can do things with a skateboard you wouldn't believe!

Night Thrasher built a team out of promising young heroes, starting with Avengers hopeful Marvel Boy, whose powerful mutant telekinesis was triggered by his time travelling future-self: Major Victory. He was deemed too inexperienced for the A team, but in an alternate future, he's one of the great Guardians of the Galaxy!

If that sounds pretty cosmic - check out Nova! Richard Rider received the powers of Nova Prime when an alien selected him to inherit the helmet of planet Xandar's intergalactic lawmen. His future exploits will pit him against an Infinity Gauntlet wielding Thanos, the deadly Annihilation Wave, and The Thunderbolts!

One of those T-Bolts was the former Speedball, whose accidental exposure to extra-dimensional forces irradiated him with energy that surrounded his body with a kinetic field. The slightest move can send him into a hyper-ballistic ricochet that turns his ultra-durable body into a living projectile!

Not to be outdone: Namorita soars the skies as easily as the seas, possessing super-human strength, durability, and ankle wing-assisted flight in the same vein as her famous elder cousin - Namor, the Sub-Mariner! The daughter of Namora is at her strongest underwater, but still packs a punch as a team powerhouse!

Her elemental opposite, but a trusted teammate, is  Angelica Jones, aka; Firestar -- a pyrokinetic mutant whose mastery of microwaves can generate intense heat, directed flames, and allows her the means of levitated flight.

An impressive line-up making their combat debut, but they face the magical might of Juggernaut! A force so powerful it has stood up to Colossus, Nimrod, Captain Britain, Hulk, The Avengers, and even DC's Superman and Wonder Woman!

Fortunately for the youngsters, he's also been a proving-ground stalled by seemingly weaker challengers, such as Spider-Man, Siryn & Deadpool, and the Teen Titans! Could the New Warriors join that list? Let's find out!

The Tape: New Warriors Ranking: Juggernaut (#57)

What Went Down...

Juggernaut teeters on the edge of being insulted as he finds himself confronted by a motley crew of young heroes leaping to the aide of a barely conscious Thor!

The New Warriors stand their ground, but Speedball is a little too eager to throw himself into the action. He launches himself like a hyper-kinetic ballistic bouncing ball, but even though he attacks rapidly from different directions -- Juggernaut finds him with the back of his hand!

Firestar shows compassion for Speedball as he's launched out of the borough, but Night Thrasher is all business -- condemning his brash teammate while ordering Namorita and Nova to protect Thor from the oncoming Juggernaut.

The flying powerhouses are already one step ahead of their fearless leader, sourcing a nearby iron girder to wrap Juggernaut up in the metal bar!

Carrying each end, they smash into the unstoppable villain, bending the bar around him -- but even with his arms pinned by his sides Juggernaut will not be waylaid!

A simple flex rips both arms free -- reducing the girder to tiny pieces of scrap metal as it shatters and launches concussive shrapnel at Nova and the Atlantean!

Marvel Boy contemplates calling in the Avengers or Fantastic Four, but Night Thrasher is hellbent on proving himself and the team. He tells MB and Firestar to get Thor clear and jumps on his hi-tech skateboard to leap into the fray!

Thrasher ducks under Juggernaut's arm as he zips past at blistering speed, but the amused villain cuts off a comeback and encourages the youngster to go live his best teenaged life -- launching him from his skateboard with a ground pound!

The directed tremor pops rider and board both into the air, but the highly trained Night Thrasher simply redirects his body weight to flip back to his nimble plank -- and drive it base-first into Juggernaut's face!

It's a high impact -- but the magical might of the Crimson Gem of Cyttorak means it barely even registers with the stalking villain.

Night Thrasher keeps up the offensive, skating around the rubble-filled battlefield to keep out of arm's reach, while pelting the Juggernaut with acid bombs and concussion grenades in search of a weakness!

Completely unfazed, Juggernaut simply continues his march toward his target -- flippantly turning his back on the young nuisance.

Enraged -- Night Thrasher rides his board straight for the enemy and leaps onto his shoulders! His obsession with stopping crime is as unstoppable as his foe!

The armored young hero keeps a mounted position over Juggernaut's helmet and unloads with a furious flurry of punches!

For all the good it does, he's playing for keeps: "I won't rest until I've found a way to make you pay! TO MAKE YOU ALL PAY FOR WHAT YOU'VE DONE!!"

Thrasher's complete focus robs him of the perspective to recognize just how in danger he is! Fortunately, Firestar spots the trouble from the skies over a nearby trainyard, and makes a beeline for her imperiled teammate!

Juggernaut snags Night Thrasher by the ankle and swings him around overhead, but Firestar is there to take custody and fly him to safety before it ends poorly.

The distraction of Firestar flying away gives Namorita and Nova a chance at a second attack!

Two train cars cast a shadow over Juggernaut, but he can't react fast enough to avoid the full brunt of their force as Namorita and Nova hurl them at him!

The trains collapse on impact -- engulfing Juggernaut in dust!

Firestar helps talk Night Thrasher down as they glide overhead, while Speedball makes his return to the rest of the team relatively unscathed. It looks like a clean win, but the New Warriors are counting their victories prematurely.

Juggernaut explodes from beneath the train cars -- filling the air with fragments of wood and metal as he throws them asunder!

It's an impressive display of raw strength, but it also provides Marvel Boy with an entire arsenal of airborne weapons!

The telekinetic mutant directs the wreckage fragments to the lumbering Juggernaut -- surrounding him in jagged pieces of wood, metal, and concrete.

The debris field proves an irritant at best, but otherwise does little to slow the unstoppable. Fortunately, its true purpose was as distraction for the airborne Firestar to get into position!

The Juggernaut is bombarded with microwaves from the sky as Firestar unleashes her mutant powers against his attire!

The intense heat generated by the waves renders Juggernaut's costume glowing white hot -- but still he marches undeterred!

Night Thrasher orders Firestar to direct her microwaves at the villain's heart, but she cannot bring herself to resort to an act of murder. It appears the New Warriors have failed, but then comes the flash of lightning and boom of thunder!

The Mighty Thor has recovered from their first round and draws Juggernaut's attention with Mjolnir raised to summon fire from the heavens!

Juggernaut remains confident as ever: "C'mon, pal. You may as well accept the inevitable! Nothing can stop the Juggernaut from squeezing the life out of you!"

Thor is no more concerned than he, dropping humbly to one knee as he calls upon the fury of the storm from the skies overhead. They respond to the gods' call, sending devastating lighting crashing to the earth where Juggernaut stands!

For a moment the New Warriors are blinded by the light, but when it dissipates they find the Juggernaut still standing -- smoldering and annoyed!

He begins the march toward his opponent, but Thor is no longer willing to indulge his enemy.

Where lightning alone failed -- the very god-force that flows through Thor's veins unites with the power of his enchanted hammer to unleash an unbridled energy the likes of which has challenged Galactus and The Celestials!

The destructive blast does not obliterate the Juggernaut -- but it does push him back -- defying the magic of the Crimson Gem that renders him unstoppable!

As he plants his foot to try to regain forward momentum -- the concrete foundation beneath him gives way -- and Juggernaut falls into a massive sinkhole!

Nova and Namorita leap into action, flying armfuls of steel girders into the gaping void. Then Firestar reduces them to a slurry of molten slag that quickly fills every nook and cranny until it rapidly cools under a frigid wind summoned by Thor -- and encases Juggernaut in a metal prison!

Knowing full well that Juggernaut will break free soon enough; Thor uses his hammer to warp the fabric of time & space itself -- banishing the massive metal shard to an unknown asteroid in distant outer space.

The Hammer...

When Juggernaut explodes out of his temporary metal prison moments later -- he's already been deposited alone in the starry void of space by Thor. Mission failed, as far as Loki's concerned.

Juggernaut was unwittingly recruited into the Acts of Vengeance by the trickster god, who plucked him out of British maximum security after a run-in with Captain Britain and Excalibur, in the hopes his unstoppable power would destroy Thor -- Loki's half-brother.

As per the setup for today's featured fight; Juggernaut made a pretty good go of catching Thor unprepared, and from the floating asteroid he's been deposited on, he vows to inevitably find a way back to Earth to get even with the thunder god!

Long time readers will know Acts of Vengeance has always been one of my favourite banner events from Marvel Comics - and this particular issue has always beamed brightly as a personal favourite. An issue I grabbed off the racks back in those heady days of a monolithic wall of new releases at the local newsagent!

It's a small wonder I've never made the time to pull out my second copy -- a back issue purchased at a reasonable price a few years ago, to replace a well worn, and possibly lost, original copy. It's a bona fide favourite, but I suppose those are the ones I sometimes keep away for myself, or for special occasions.

Over on X (aka; Twitter), the fine purveyor of NewWarriors.com was kind enough to go out of their way to recommend our humble Fight Club to the comic book masses still hanging tough on the micro-blogging social media service. That was enough of an excuse for me to finally dig this issue out and go hog wild!

In case you somehow haven't been checking out the dedicated dotcom [I'm sure you will now!]: Thor #412 serves as the first full appearance of the New Warriors - in action after their debut cameo at the end of Thor #411.

It's a pretty darn strong debut for a new group, comprised of a small handful of Marvel's youthful odds & ends, and their newly created leader - Night Thrasher!

Thor #412 certainly ingratiated the team with me as a young reader, who might've only vaguely recognized one or two of the characters from chance encounters with some other stray appearances, or promotional artwork in something like Marvel Age.

I suppose Firestar had some shine coming from the Spider-Man and his Amazing Friends animated series, and Speedball was a still-recent conceited effort to create a new young hero with his own title -- having brought Steve Ditko back into the Marvel fold some twenty years after he helped create icons like Spider-Man and Doctor Strange -- but the rest were pretty obscure to a young reader in early 1990. Hangovers from the seventies and issues of Defenders or Sub-Mariner.

Of course, Night Thrasher is a brand new creation, so it's little wonder he gets the most time to shine in the fight, even as the rest of the team have their moments. He's in danger of appearing unhinged or reckless, but they maintain the fine line of creating interest without rendering the hero a lost cause.

I'm sure the cover had a great deal to do with drawing me in. Obviously Thor was an established major attraction, but the colourful group of characters ripping through a bold turquoise background surely popped off the stands when I was browsing the wall to make my choice for a single comic purchase as a small boy.

Joe Sinnott is credited with finished art over Ron Frenz story & pictures, and while I can't accurately break down the division of labour, I can say that images from this comic left an impression on me for years to come.

Mark Bagley will arguably take ownership of the characters as soon as the New Warriors series launches a few months later, but the first impression made here is indelible. The storytelling - keeping a dazed Thor at the centre of concern - is economical yet urgent. The action is bombastic, but always easy to follow. The renderings of characters clean & attractive, especially in the big heroic spreads that open the issue. It all comes together to make a very strong impression.

It's kind of the same playbook used years later to introduce The Thunderbolts in Incredible Hulk #449, before the group spun-off into their own first issue a few months later. You've got a similar rub of appearing in a marquee series, albeit without the title character also being the overwhelming challenge they face. I think the New Warriors did it much more convincingly, though.

Of course, as much as the New Warriors are the big breakout heroes of the story -- this appearance of Juggernaut was also massively informative to my impression of the character moving forward.

Ever since Spider-Man fought the unbeatable foe, and won, in Amazing Spider-Man #230, Juggernaut has kinda been ripe for taking an L to put other characters over. I wonder if writer Tom DeFalco and his artists were conscious of that when putting the issue together, because right from that opening splash page: a slightly bewildered Juggernaut, gazing blankly out from under his reflective red-brown helmet, looks big, strong, and not to be trifled with!

He's rarely been as convincingly unstoppable as he is in this issue, even if it's under opposition from heroes who are largely in one, two, or even three weight classes below him. The palpable danger he presents only goes further to enhance the young heroes who are making their debut, and doing everything they can just to stop him getting hands on a severely dazed Thor.

So, who actually won? This one gets a little tricky...

Juggernaut will always come back eventually, but lets assume we all understand that a fight can end with simple defeat, rather than permanent incapacitation.

Spider-Man secured his famous win by submerging Juggernaut in construction concrete -- not dissimilar from what happened in today's fight. The only difference is, we know Juggernaut broke free from the hardened steel within moments of being sealed, ready to fight on. It then becomes a question of whether or not teleporting him to a distant space body constitutes an act of victory, or avoidance.

Because Juggernaut never really showed significant signs of defeat, and was very much ready to continue brawling when he emerged from his steel cocoon -- I'm inclined to call this one a draw. Thor and the New Warriors did their best to get the better of Juggernaut, but he was barely even stalled. Tough break!

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Winner: Inconclusive (Draw)
#19 (--) Thor
#125 (+2) Nova
#503 (new) Firestar
#504 (new) Namorita
#505 (new) Night Thrasher
#462 (--) Speedball [+1 assist]
#518 (+84) Marvel Boy (Vance Astro)
#57 (--) Juggernaut

THUNDERBOLTS versus NOVA
Home Truths (Marvel comics)
Where: Nova #3 When: August 2007
Why: Dan Abnett & Andy Lanning How: Sean Chen

The story so far...
Now the last of the legendary intergalactic corps of Xandarian Nova Centurions; an exhausted Richard Rider embarks on a journey to return to Earth, acting on the advice of the artificial intelligence, the Worldmind.

Seasoned by his adventures in space, Rider returns a more mature hero than he once was as member of the New Warriors. Having led thousands to their deaths in the war against the Annihilation Wave, Nova finds the self-interested squabbles that have transpired in his absence easily dwarfed by the intergalactic threats to reality he has faced.

Confronted upon his return by Director of SHIELD, Iron Man; Nova is asked to join the Registration Initiative to turn his newly acquired cosmic powers and leadership to the training of a new generation of heroes. Given time to ponder the offer, Nova may find himself ultimately swayed by the intervention of his former teammate Speedball, and his new colleagues, the Thunderbolts!

Previous Form:
Thunderbolts [#6]: This incarnation holds a narrow victory over Jack Flag.
Nova (#73): A single victory over the villain Diamondhead.

Tale of the tape...
Strength: Moonstone 6 (Invincible)
Intelligence: Radioactive Man 5 (Professor)
Speed: Nova 7 (Light Speed)
Stamina: Moonstone 6 (Generator)
Agility: Penance 4 (Gymnast)
Fighting Ability: Nova 4 (Trained Fighter)
Energy Powers: Radioactive Man 6 (Mass Destruction)


- The Thunderbolts are: Moonstone, Penance, Radioactive Man, and Venom.

Assembled under the leadership of an exonerated Norman Osborn; this version of the Thunderbolts are part of a US government division operating seperate, but in conjunction with, SHIELD's superhero registration agenda.

The team is exclusively comprised of reformed super-villains, with the exception of Penance, who, as Speedball, was a member of the New Warriors; the team responsible for the Stamford tragedy that killed hundreds of school children.

Moonstone and Songbird are the only two remaining members from Baron Zemo's original assemblage of diguised Masters of Evil. Their status as senior members, coupled with a divergence of acceptance for Osborn's direction, has led to friction between the two. Despite their familiarities, the frictions have been shown to interfere in their field competence, particularly in dealing with unfamiliar factors like Venom and the brooding, but massively powerful, Penance.

Lurking in the shadows is a contingency for the Thunderbolts in the form of the mass murdering assassin, Bullseye. Though effectively the team's trump card, Bullseye is kept from public eye, allowing for the delicately balanced charade of heroism to be maintained.

- As a teen; Long Island native, Richard Rider, was selected by the dying alien, Rhomann Dey, to assume the mantle of the Nova-Prime.
Swept into a world of intergalactic war and peace keeping, Rider eventually leaves behind his superheroing deeds to join other members of the Nova Corps on the reconstructed home world of Dey - Xandar.

Homesick, Rider relinquished his powers in exchange for the right to return home, but an encounter with the armored hero Night Thrasher would reveal that his powers merely lay dormant within him. Together the two would be prominent members of the teen superteam, the New Warriors.

Rider would revisit his role as a space cop in the battle against the Annihilation Wave. It is here that the Nova Corps of Xandar are once again exterminated, thus leaving Nova to inheret the entirety of their power matrix, the Worldmind.
With infinitely increased powers, Nova becomes the leader of the intergalactic resistence against Annihilus and his armies, and matures into a universal force for justice capable of generating energy blasts, tapping into a reality spanning encyclopaedia of knowledge, and travelling through time and space at fantastic speeds.

The Math: Nova (Average) Thunderbolts (Total) The Pick: Nova

What went down...
Having utilized his massive powers in the defense and arrest of his waiting arch-nemesis, Diamondhead [Nova #2]; Rider finds himself in the unfamiliar scenario of being attacked by the Thunderbolts under the jurisdiction of the Superhuman Registration Act.

Venom is the first to attack, triggering a distanced analysis by the Worldmind. Despite having learnt much from the AI system, it is Nova who this time informs his on-board advisory of the nature of the beast. The Nova Corpsman makes a late leap into the air, avoiding Venom's diving attack to leave him to eat pavement.

Nova chastises the team for attacking in a populated urban street; foibles that don't tend to bother the likes of Moonstone and Radioactive Man, who each launch an energy based attack on Nova. Combining their abilities, they incapacitate his control over self-gravity, resulting in a harsh descent.

Moonstone summons Penance, apparently unaware of his history with Nova as the light-hearted New Warrior, Speedball. She also notes Nova's status as a cosmically powered hero who is not to be underestimated.

Nova emerges from the hole his body made in the street, now having donned his helmet. He summons an energy blast to incapacitate the salivating Venom, while using more specific means for Moonstone, a "phased pulse" doing the trick.

Penance simmers with kinetic energy, but remains flat footed, while Radioactive Man picks up the slack. The radiation of the electromagnetic blast proves inconsequential thanks to the defensive capabilities of the Nova Centurion armor, but the blast is sufficient enough to send the hero hurtling through a stationary truck, into a building.

In a pile of rubble and reeling from the attack, Nova is unable to defend himself as Venom leaps in for a second lick. The burly symbiote pins Nova on his stomach, wrapping his taloned fingers around the floored hero's neck.

Radioactive Man summons Penance from his pause, hoping to utilize his awesome power to put an end to Nova's resistence.
Though reluctant, Robbie Baldwin turns his guilt inward to summon a massive burst of his other-dimensional kinetic energies, reminiscent of his first outing with the Thunderbolts [Thunderbolts #111].

The massively destructive power of Penance's kinetic energy quite literally brings an entire building down atop his former ally. Robbie's current leader, Moonstone, descends on the wreckage with the Radioactive Man with an order to summon their mobile imprisonment "T-Wagon".

To the shock of all, Nova saves them the trouble of finding a body, emerging from the wreckage with a blast of firey, rocketeering energy. The frustrated hero turns the tables on the Thunderbolts by reading them their rights on the basis of the Nova Corps "Pan-Worlds Jurisdiction Treaty."

The clash of law enforcement powers is interrupted by a third party: SHIELD!
Descending with a support team of field agents, the director himself, Iron Man, makes his presence known. Chastising Moonstone for her team's tactics in a densly populated public area, Iron Man does his best to pull rank and calm the situation, as the Thunderbolts leader tries to use Stark's own Registrated Act as justification against him.

Having previously offered Nova a senior position with his Initiative; Tony Stark accompanies him to a more private meeting place to discuss Nova's decision. Though tempted by the support network, the cosmic hero bows to his own responsibilities, and returns to the stars to rekindle the flame of the Nova Corps.

The hammer...
Well, as we close November with a crawl, I give you a draw!
Though both sides got their licks in, I think we can all agree IM pacified the situation before it could really reach any kind of definitive sway.

Adi Granov's covers have a way of demanding the attention of a reader with their futuristic render, typically dwarfing pencils any less than superb. This was entirely true of the fairly mediocre sequentials of Nova, but their plain presentation masks an exercise in super-mundanity that is, at the very least, worthy of acknowledging applause.

Baring the bittersweet branding of Civil War: Initiative after only one issue; the new series, written by Dan Abnett and Andy Lanning in unknown portions, spins out of the cosmic sleeper crossover, Annihilation.
The book connects with Annihilation's sequel, Conquest, as of issue four, and yet somehow it manages to earn that marketting without the negative conotations washing over your brain as you read this. This is truly a marvellous feat, but once you get past the obvious, it's even more amazing!

In a post-Civil War world where most pro-registrants are predictably concerned with anything but unregistered heroes; the Thunderbolts represent the most proactive element remaining, essentially dedicated to nothing but tracking that element. While Warren Ellis has meandered his way through a combination of light politics and thick character interactions, he's largely failed to deliver on the action in this monster-filled revamp of the Thunderbolts. My point?

It's titles like Nova that have picked up the slack on the street level, illustrating the expected prevelance of the Thunderbolts team. So not only are Abnett and Lanning graciously bowing to editorial mash-ups in their own job, but they're also picking up the slack of other jobs. All that: plus they manage to interweave tonnes of reference to days of Nova past by revisiting vague references with the same fluid flow that facilitated all this other content.

This isn't a great book. To be honest, having bagged all of the first four issues in one-hit, I haven't even the desire to read on, but that simply doesn't change the fact that the craft here is some of the finest Marvel superhero writing to be published in 2007 -- or maybe even years prior!
This book really does it all, without any of the advantageous pretentions or disillusions of being closed off to the rest of the Marvel world. These issues cram in as much character, story, and reality as any issue of Daredevil, but does so without ever feeling like a lazy conceptual hiding behind "style."

So, why aren't I reading on? I guess in a world of hiking prices and shrinking budgets, the reader becomes increasingly selective. As strong a read as this is, it does ultimately lead into a crossover I'm not sure I'm willing to indulge in, and shifts away from the settings that make the first three issues so enjoyable.

And before we wrap up, just to go back to Thunderbolts, I couldn't help but think to the recent issue featuring sessions with Doc Samson, while reading promotional interviews for Jeph Loeb's upcoming work on the "Red Hulk".

Apparently Samson is set to join the investigation surrounding the identity of this new Hulk, with Loeb adopting a deliberate conceit of an FBI profiler, that is interesting, but described in a way that leaves one ever so slightly disappointed.
Of the new Samson, Loeb says, "Leonard Samson, eager to prove himself beyond being just a psychiatrist with green hair, takes the lead."
Pursuing the Hulk in the field is hardly new for Doc Samson, but one can't help but feel that the character's portrayal in the pages of Ellis' Thunderbolts remains a glaringly unexplored facet of the Marvel Universe. It might not quite be necessary to go Dr. Katz with it, but with many heroes tied up in government funded operations, it would've been nice to see Samson employing his psychiatric expertise in more conventional manners.

Oh well, punch on, Doc!
In the meantime, I should probably admit that this one was a standby issue. We've been running a little slow lately, but hopefully December plans will serve up some satisfactory seasons readings for your Infinite Wars needs. Stay tuned for the Punch-Up for more of those Earth-spanning shennanigans!

The Fight: 4 The Issue: 5

Fans of solid superhero writing may just find this book a great way to explore a character they may otherwise be unfamiliar with. As described in the bulk of the review, these early issues of Nova manage to touch upon much of the Initiative, while also providing entry points for the cosmic reneissance occuring with the various Annihilation events. A great stocking-stuffer if you're doing some last minute Christmas shopping on Amazon!

MARVEL ZOMBIES versus SILVER SURFER
Marvel Zombies (Marvel comics)
Where: Marvel Zombies #3 When: April 2006
Why: Robert Kirkman How: Sean Phillips

The story so far...
In the universe dubbed 2149, heroes and villains are no longer of any relevant concern. However, this is not a reality of uptopian peace and harmony among man.
The super powered heroes and villains of the Marvel universe have simply become infectious walking dead -- zombies!

With humanity all but exterminated, and the efforts of the genius zombified Reed Richards having been foiled by his alternate counterpart, the zombies are tortured by their lust for fresh meat.

Their undead prayers are soon answered with the arrival of a chrome skinned spaceman called the Silver Surfer, who warns of the coming of the great devourer, but they've got news for him: HE'S the one that's going to get devoured!

Previous Form:
Silver Surfer (#28): Silver Surfer had a victory over Green Lantern, Kyle Rayner.
Marvel Zombies: They ate Magneto...

Tale of the tape...
Strength: Hulk 6 (Invincible)
Intelligence: Giant-Man 6 (Genius)
Speed: Nova 7 (Light Speed)
Stamina: Silver Surfer 6 (Generator)
Agility: Spider-man 5 (Cat-like)
Fighting Ability: Wolverine 6 (Warrior)
Energy Powers: Silver Surfer 7 (Solar Power)


Ah, well, here we are again, approaching once more the monumental task of one unfortunate against the ravenous league of the Marvel Zombies. No, not the fans! The infected heroes and villains of the title of the same name.

Our format has changed considerably since the last time we did this [Marvel Zombies #1], and because of that, I feel the need to at least clarify the roster of zombified characters we are dealing with. They are as follows: Iron Man, Nova, Vulture, Falcon, Storm, Thor, Moon Knight, Black Bolt, Captain Marvel, Daredevil, Iron Fist, Wolverine, Angel, Captain America, Sub-Mariner, Crystal, Gambit, Ghost Rider, Speedball, Deadpool, Black Widow, Giant-Man, Spider-man, Hulk, Beast, Hercules and Power Man, Luke Cage.

That's twenty-seven zombie characters all up!
A pretty big ask for even the Silver Surfer, whose power cosmic provides a wide array of strengths and abilities.

A few people, in response to the Rise of the Silver Surfer trailer have expressed explicit confusion about the nature of the character's abilities. To clarify some of that (and hopefully make this section less boring than usual), the Surfer does not phase through objects.
At least, not in such bland terms. "Phasing" is an expression I would limit to a Kitty Pryde, whose chief ability relates to intangibility and passing through objects.

At various stages the extent of Silver Surfer's cosmic powers have been explored, highlighting his abilities on a molecular and atomic level. So, as far as passing through buildings and buses and whatnot, he's less "phasing" than he is displaying his brisk harmony with the universe, and molecular manipulation.
Given some time and energy, he could probably turn lead into gold, too.

So, against an army of Marvel Zombies, does this come in handy?
Maybe, but it isn't one of his chief abilities and requires some effort, so he's not about to try to turn Iron Fist into cheese mid-fight. He's more likely, as I'm sure you're about to see, mow them down with raw blasts of cosmic energy.

Since even Wolverine has been ravaged by the degenerative qualities of this particular brand of zombie-ism, it's safe to say the Surfer has a great chance of coming out on top here. That said, many of them retain their offensive powers, which does pose a problem.

I guess at the end of this we just have to look at it as one for the fans. Cheap!

The Math: Marvel Zombies (Total) Silver Surfer (Average)
The Pick: The Silver Surfer

What went down...
Trust the math to cop-out and pick both sides!
Things kick off from the opening of this action-packed issue! A zombified Tony Stark [pictured above] leads the charge, with various other flying characters hovering around for a taste of the action.

Not one for emotion at the best of times, and not really used to people doing anything but cower in fear in his presence, Silver Surfer meets their challenge willingly. His cosmic plast tears through Iron Man's armor with ease, shredding his decaying body at the waist.

The airborne torso manages to snag the Surfer's board and leg, while the Vulture and Nova swing around for a bite of the cherry. They provide sufficient interference to pull the Surfer's cosmic blast off course.
It narrowly misses Stark's head, leaving him free to ravenously attempt to take a bite out of the chrome thigh before him. His teeth chip on the cosmic wrap, much to the Surfer's stoic disgust.

"In all my travels -- I have never encountered such creatures!"
He frees himself of the full nelson, and fires off devestating blasts at Nova and Captain Mar-Vell, penetrating gut and face respectively.

A lurking Thor makes his presence known, swinging his mighty hammer Mjolnir with a thundering KROOM!
The force of the blow knocks the Silver Surfer from his board, but likewise shatters the stone head of the Asgardian hammer. Perhaps the barer was no long worthy...

Landing hard on the apocalyptic street level below, the harbinger from space finds himself with many more abominations to contend with.

Colonel America leads the charge, promising double rations to the man or woman who makes the kill. Something easier said than done. The Vulture and Moon Knight each take the brunt of cosmic blasts, followed by Namor, and Falcon.

Charging through some of the other street level characters, Wolverine declares his intentions, but is quickly embarrassed.
The mutant takes a swipe with his adamantium claws, but while the skeleton is willing, the flesh is weak. His claws and forearm tear straight through his failing skin and flesh as he strikes the Surfer's sturdy chest.

With his healing factor unable to fight the decomposition, and no ligaments to contain his adamantium laced bones, Wolverine trims the fat. With his good arm, he slices away at the exposed bones and ragged edges of torn skin and muscle.
At this time, he feels a tap at his ankle.

The upper torso of Iron Man asks Wolverine for a lift, and with his one good arm, he's all too happy to oblige a fastball special.

Iron Man hurtles through the falling and fighting bodies of Speedball, Ghost Rider, Deadpool and others, as Gambit's disembodied head floats across the battlefield. Giant-Man arrives from his lab in time to witness the slaughter, and remains content to hideout in the shadows of the alleyways for the time being.

Meanwhile, on the sidelines, Bruce Banner and Spider-man are both carrying prominent injuries. Banner, with a hole in his gut, feels the hunger gnawing, while Spidey metaphorically gnaws at himself, relieving his body of a useless, dangling leg. By then, Banner is no more, and Hulk has entered the fight.

Don't make him hungry. You wouldn't like him when he's hungry!

The Surfer continues to expell his energies, fending off the never-ending physical onslaught of the zombie armada.

Beast, Black Bolt and others are tossed aside as the rampaging Hulk charges at the first signs of food! He snatches the Surfer from Beast's grip, and scoops him up valiantly in a cradle, declaring "the silver man" as his.

The Surfer has other ideas, firing off a double barrelled blast of cosmic energy at point blank. The gambit is enough to free him from the green goliath's grip, and gives him an opportunity to reunite with his surfboard.

With Colonel America and others in pirsuit, it is again the Hulk who gets the benefit of the alien. Hulk's mighty leap sees him landing atop the chrome herald, forcing them again away from the intergalactic surfboard.

Furious about the damage suffered at the Surfer's blast; a charred face Hulk, seething with strength, guarantees the Silver Surfer regret his resistence.

The Hulk's teeth and jaws prove powerful enough to penetrate the Silver Surfer's hardy exterior. He crunches down, biting the head off like a crazed rockstar.
The cosmic energies housed within spew forth from both the Hulk's mouth, and the gaping neck of the gleeming herald to Galactus.

Giant-Man steps out of the shadows to give Iron Man and Spidey a helping hand toward the feeding. Thor, Wolverine, Powerman and Colonel America are all quick to get their fill, before having the torn body snatched away by Giant-Man.

As things start to get nasty amongst the squabbling zombies, Colonel America makes the discovery that they have inherited some of the Surfer's power by feasting on his chromed flesh. He does so by blasting Beast's objecting head off.

The hammer...
Is there any way being eaten could make you the victor? With the killing blow struck by the Hulk, I declare the Marvel Zombies victorious! Assists for all, with Hulk picking up the kill!

I've probably gone a bit generous on this one. There were a few characters thrown in there getting the assist who really weren't seen to be all that effective. Crystal shows up for a single panel, as best as I can recall at 2:30am.
There's some implication that Gambit is about to do something pretty spectacular, but the biggest scenes for the Cajun are being blasted through the chest, and his decapitated head being thrown across the background.

Still, I guess thems the breaks when we dare to do these BIG superhero battles on Secret Earths. They're usually a bit of fun to read, but when it comes to recapping and judging, it can be a bit of a pain in the ol' arse, if I may say so.

A lot of love being thrown the Marvel Zombies way again with the recent Army of Darkness vs Marvel Zombies mini-series.
I haven't had the chance to pick up any issues yet, but I do have one distinct problem with the project. No, it's not the longevity of the concept, and it isn't anything to do with burning sacred cows. It's the longterm logic of it.

As near as I can tell, the series is set before this particular mini we reviewed here today [Marvel Zombies], but that means Ash and the Army of Darkness intellectual properties, rights and trademarks are being tied into something that will inevitably outlast any agreement between the involved parties.
So not only do you have a concept from an unrelated medium impeding on proceedings, but there's the real likelihood that it will prevent any canonical reference to this period of the past.

Of course, I might be scaremongering there. It might not really matter, and certainly for the on-going adventures of the Marvel Zombies, I can't imagine it will. I'm very much looking forward to the upcoming storyarc with Black Panther and the new Fantastic Four.

Dramatic resonances of the Black Panther involvement aside [BP is a surviving human in Marvel Zombies], I just think it's a nice change of pace to be seeing quirky concepts like this being drifted toward the 'serious' business.
It could very easily overstay it's welcome, and cross into in-your-face mundanity, but for the time being I watch with interest.

On another related note -- if you backtrack through the downing of what went, you'll notice during Thor's moment of glory I made reference to Mjolnir.
The hammer explodes upon impact with the Surfer, which isn't really what Mjolnir is known for in the regular universe, so it potentially answers a question I would have asked: -- Is zombie Thor still worthy of lifting the enchanted hammer?

I guess you could theorize that deep-down he is worthy, and that the spell is somewhat robotic or mechanical in it's determination. You could extrapolate to come up with some sort of meta-mystic theory that the hammer shattered because it was weakened byproxy by the infection.
Or you could just say it was a fun moment, with a bit of creative oversight.

Certainly, despite an upcoming prequel, the series does not feel like something carefully crafted and built atop lengthy planning. Which is where some of my concerns for the Zombies franchise enter the picture, but we'll burn it as it comes.

Ah, we can also harken back to a discussion had previously [What if...? #24], where I asked how Wolverine, healing factor and all, could be infected to begin with. Apparently the proposition here is that the zombie infection has simply overpowered his regenerative capabilities.
It's a simple solution, but I can't help but think it isn't what I'd go with...

Well, it's getting late and I'm probably minutes away from getting incoherrent, so I'll wrap it up here. Stay tuned for next week when we wrap up with a MAJOR finale for What If Wednesdays, and fight out where we're going next in the May Punch-Up! Cheers!

The Fight: 5 The Issue: 5.5

THE THUNDERBOLTS versus JACK FLAG
Faith In Monsters Part 2 (Marvel comics)
Where: Thunderbolts #111 When: April 2007
Why: Warren Ellis How: Mike Deodato Jr.

The story so far...
Under the direction of Norman Osborn, the Thunderbolts have been completely overhauled in the wake of the Civil War. Incorporating existing members of the super-team and former criminals recruited to hunt rogue heroes, the new team is a volatile and untested mess.

Placing Moonstone in the position of leader, Osborn sends the team out on their first mission: Defeat and detain the rogue protégé of Captain America; Jack Flag.

With the press watching will this soft-target be the undoing of a team of reformed and manipulated villains. Or will they unravel live on the air?

Previous Form:
The Thunderbolts [#14]: Moonstone and Songbird were defeated by the Hulk as part of the classic Thunderbolts.
Venom (#63): Venom has a lethal victory over the Space Phantom.
Bullseye (#77): Bullseye has a victory against Daredevil, for two defeats.
Radioactive Man (#110): Radioactive Man was among the team assembled to take down the Anti-Registration Avengers.
Swordsman, Penance: Neither of these characters have been featured previously on the site.
Jack Flag: Jack Flag has not yet been featured on the site.

Tale of the tape...
Strength: Moonstone 6 (Invincible)
Intelligence: Radioactive Man 5 (Professor)
Speed: Speedball/Penance 5 (Super Speed)
Stamina: Moonstone 6 (Generator)
Agility: Speedball/Penance 4 (Gymnast)
Fighting Ability: Jack Flag 4 (Trained Fighter)
Energy Powers: Radioactive Man 6 (Mass Destruction)

So, as we continue Marvel Ultimate Alliance Mondays, this is supposed to be the Radioactive Man representitive entry. Confession time: Radioactive Man is a pretty insignificant cog in this entry, but I'm not a huge fan of the character, so it's about as good as it gets.

As a character in this situation Radioactive Man is probably more of a second-tier performer, but he brings a great deal to the team. Strength, intelligence and radioactive power being his trifecta of terror.

There seems to have been some confusion about the origins of the Jack Flag character. He's only been on the job since the early nineties, and initially brought very little to the game as an admirer of Captain America.
His skills developed with intensive training and clearly he picked up some points from the Captain himself. It's difficult to tell to what degree it has been retained, but he also gained super human strength after a tussle with Mr. Hyde.

It seems Flag has maybe been scaled down a little from that level, bringing him back to more of a 'roid raging 4 on our stat tape.

Guys like Venom, Radioactive Man and Moonstone all excede his strength level, and Moonstone, Venom and even Songbird have the skills to potentially outmaneuver the earth-bound Flag.

The key to victory for Flag would have to be using the inexperience of some of the characters, and exploiting the lack of preperation they've had as a team. Certainly the volatile nature of many of the characters only stirs the chemicals of dissent and distrust. That said, it's a big ask!

The Math: The Thunderbolts
The Pick: The Thunderbolts

What went down...
The Thunderbolts catch up with Jack Flag in Ohio, where he's been breaking up various criminal activities in defiance of the superhero registration act. Delivering justice without a paycheque or equipment and health benefits... Actually, why wouldn't a two-bit schmuck like Flag be signing up?!

In a scene that would send a film soundtrack platinum, the team struts in unison from their space age plane vehicle. If it were a Mattel the individual credits would go in an order along the lines of; sweet ass Songbird, marvellous Moonstone, radical Radioactive Man, peripherally challenged Penance, voulptuous Venom and the swinging Swordsman!

So, anyway, Moonstone goes about fullfilling her roll as new 'team leader' by orchestrating from the sidelines. With Jack Flag standing tall in the middle of a parking lot, Moonstone orders Radioactive Man to blow the gas tanks, making it appear to the on-looking press as though Flag had rigged the explosions himself.

The explosions put Flag on the back foot, as Moonstone sends in Swordsman and Venom to do the work of soldiers. Unfortunately she doesn't count on the strength and determination of the flag-clad hero, who shatters Swordsman's sword as it hovers above him.

Flag rolls back, booting the airborne sword end into Venom's chest, whilst using the follow throw to knock Swordsman for six.

Though the sword tip doesn't do any permanent damage to the symbiote-clad Mac Gargan, it does send him into a berzerker rage. As Flag stomps on Swordsman's helmet, Venom doubles in size and becomes a veiny mess... Hello!

Flag feels the sting of Venom's taloned fingertips, and finds himself in the grip of a creature that's pretty intent on eating his head. A prospect that would produce a win for the Thunderbolts, to be sure, but probably isn't the kind of press you want on the six O'clock news.

Moonstone plays moderator, calling for the activation of an implant that subdues Venom with an electrical charge. They'll pass it off as a hand-held weapon concealed in Jack Flag's gloves later. Oh, they're sly!

Songbird heads to the sky, but the smoke cover caused by the exploded cars proves to make her influence moot. Flag, freed of Venom's grip, goes about taking possession of something that may or may not be a misproportioned wheel mag.

Recalling the advice of his now deceased mentor, Captain America, he whips the cylindrical shrapnel into the air, ricocheting it off a street sign and lamp post, to strike Songbird directly in the throat. The jolt to her vocals quells her sound-based energy powers, and brings her into a heavy descent atop one of the surviving stationary vehicles.

Moonstone denies Radioactive Man opportunity to step in, instead seeing the opportunity to showcase the newest face on the team - Penance. Formerly Speedball, the massochistic turn he's taken, donning an iron maidenesque outfit, allows him to turn his kinetic powers outward.

With blood trickling from his suit, Penance brims with energy and hurls it into the lot. It stirs already twisted metal into the air, but ultimately finds it's target.

Though he's struck in the back, Flag is able to not only survive the onslaught, but turn it to his advantage as he attempts to make an escape down an alley.

The police cut off his backdoor, and he proves unwilling to fight the drones of the law. Perhaps a misguided mark of respect for the men in uniform and their distance from the 'Civil War', or perhaps the true sign of a hero.

Either way he switches strategy, kicking his way into the lower levels of one of the surrounding buildings. A chance to create a distraction and find his way to his goals. Unfortunately, there was one contingent he didn't count on.
There was one last trump the team didn't display in front of the cameras and the action figure buying children, and that was the scariest one of them all. The one scarier than the alien costume that eats brains, or the bulky Chinese guy who glows green.

Flag feels it before he knows what's happened -- a sai burying deep into his spinal column. The sting of the man called Bullseye, lurking in the shadows to clean up the mess before it spilled completely out of control.
He never misses his target. Flag's cauda equina is the victim, and he will never walk again. All in a day's work for the might Thunderbolts.

The hammer...
Well, with the assist going to the rest of the team, Bullseye scores the victory for the Thunderbolts. Go team!

Y'know, there's a certain level of excitement that occurs when a person says "Warren Ellis" and "Thunderbolts" in the same sentence. Especially when that prospect is said to entail a complete overhaul of the B-list team. Which is a fact that only becomes even more exciting when names like Green Goblin, Venom and Bullseye are getting thrown around!

Unfortunately, the imagination tends to run a little wild with those ingredients, and what actually rests in one's hands is of a flavour more pedestrian, perhaps.
Actually, that accurately describes the tone of the book, as Ellis panders to the 'real world' repercussions of a world where the superheroes have been dubbed outlaws.

There are a handfull of criticisms coming the way of this, and none is more sound than the theory that Bullseye and Mac Gargan could be sold to the public as the good guys. Bullseye, a character we featured just recently, wherein he was dubbed number four on America's Most Wanted list, a hero? [Daredevil #49]

Fair enough, he seems to be lurking shackled to the shadows with armed guards, but Venom is among the public face of the team. His raging "kill!" screaming outburst is dismissed by Moonstone as she fronts the press after the assault, as she assures them Venom is quite incapable of killing, despite a long history of being a known killer and menace in public. Something that dates back even to the days of Eddie Brock [a 'lethal protector'], should there be illusions about who is wearing the symbiote.
Of course, Gargan is the Venom that only a couple of years ago tore buildings down in the streets of New York in an effort to gain the advantage over Spider-man.

I digress, there are some issues to be taken with the details.
What was perhaps most disappointing to me was the subdued nature of the book, and the shadowy psuedo-realistic artwork by Deodato Jr, someone who seems to be being pushed in this sort of street realism capacity; presumably for his photo referenced pencil work.

I think what I hoped for was something a little less covert, exhibiting the unbridled enthusiasm of a Nextwave, or something akin to it. Not necessarily so over-the-top or tongue-in-cheek, but more vibrant, and action packed, and free flowing.

Remove those expectations and there is a good read to be found here.
Some of the conventions and tools are a little obvious, but the first three issues approach facets of the concept with purpose. The first issue reveals the new team, the second issue puts them into action and exposes some problems, and the third issue explains and faces some of the changes, including superficial qualities like Radioactive Man's new suit, or the dramatic changes.

Love it or hate it, it's a decent read, and though seemingly slow paced, as an opening arc it seems to be taking very sure steps forward. Things should hopefully pick up by the second, as team dynamics begin to settle, motivations become clearer, and problems escalate outside of the parade of Z-list heroes.

One can't help but anticipate the in-house problems that will arise with guys like Bullseye on the team. A character who couldn't possibly remain on the team for much longer than a few years, guaranteed.

As for Jack Flag, it's a shame they crippled him. He actually seemed to have come out the end of a revamp looking like a strong prospect for a hero in the post-Captain America world. Maybe that's a little too Death of Superman for some, but I think it might have been nice.

Norman Osborn is looking better than he has in a while too. Hilarious ending!
Songbird apparently got herself a character too, which helps. Albeit, she stole it from Dr. Cameron from TV's House MD, but fair enough...

The Fight: 4.5 The Issue: 5.5

NEXT WEEK: Fin Fang Foom!